tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-57614036385612350362024-03-05T03:01:01.459-08:00cakehatstasting life twice;
in the moment and in retrospectionkirsthttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13230739583008991647noreply@blogger.comBlogger223125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5761403638561235036.post-57644653917209215552015-12-13T11:57:00.000-08:002015-12-13T17:44:56.133-08:00"How do I measure up in comparison?"<div class="p1">
One of the sweetest young men I know asked me this question the other day:</div>
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"Sometimes I feel bad and critical of myself because I haven't gone on a mission (yet..?) while my brothers, dad, mom, sister, uncles, cousins, great-grandpa and whoever else has. Is that normal?"</blockquote>
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<span class="s1">And of course, it is normal. It is universally normal.</span> </div>
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We all tend to measure ourselves against those around us; using others as a "yardstick" to determine our own stature by comparison, value by correlation, typicality by juxtaposition is human nature. </div>
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Generally, however it is not helpful or beneficial to do this. The very definition of "comparison" is "the quality of being similar or equivalent" which NONE OF US are. Not just because of the dramatic ways that our individual DNA has turned us out the way we are, or how our childhoods, experiences, and effects of societal conditioning have shaped us -- but because by the very design of God, we are different:</div>
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1 Corinthians 12:18-22<br />
<i>But now hath God set the members every one of them in the body, as it hath pleased him. And if they were all one member, where were the body? But now are they many members, yet but one body. And the eye cannot say unto the hand, I have no need of thee: nor again the head to the feet, I have no need of you. Nay, much more those members of the body, which seem to be more feeble, are necessary</i></blockquote>
In other words, God has established, in his wisdom and love, that we are all distinct members of a single body, his family. Through our differences we have dissimilar abilities, dissimilar purposes, and dissimilar substance. We are not similar or equivalent, i.e. "equal another in value, amount, function, meaning, etc." Yet we are all necessary, we all belong, and we are all equally loved.<br />
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How would it be for an eye to measure its value or ability to function by comparing itself to a hand when they are so different? How would either the hand or the eye gain a real understanding of their individual meaning by contrasting and measuring themselves to something that is, does, and means something totally different?<br />
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This is purposeful on God's part because this life is about learning to let go of comparing and instead to gauge your substance, your worth, and your path via your own spiritually guided sense of self and what you learn is God's will for you.</div>
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<span class="s1">It isn't easy though.</span></div>
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<span class="s1">Essentially human beings make sense of the world by comparing. W</span>e take something and examine how it is similar and different to everything else in order to understand it. This is sometimes referred to as "meaning cues" or what we have learned from life experiences. For example, "meaning is held in memories," in what children have seen, heard, lived thus far, therefore new learning "should make sense in comparison to what they know, or understand, about their world" (<a href="http://www.parentliteracypartners.com/meaning-structure-and-visual-cues.html">source</a>). I think that's why we do this same comparison to our "selves" too. We are trying to make sense of the world by seeing what others are/do and then taking from that a definition of right/wrong, good/bad, success/failure etc.</div>
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<span class="s1">In responding to that initial question at the beginning of this post, I told him that I believe missions can be great for people. I am glad I went because of how it changed me and made me better. But, i</span>t also hurt me in some ways. (Just last night I had a mission PTSD dream! I woke up anxious and it lasted most of the morning.)</div>
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<span class="s1">Despite this, and other drawbacks, for me the pros outweigh the cons. I don't think that is true for everyone who goes... For this reason, </span>I often feel that it is unfortunate that our culture puts so much pressure on young people to go on missions, and especially to go on missions right away. I don't think that a mission is the "right thing" for everyone, even with all the good it offers, and I especially don't think it is the right thing for everyone at the VERY YOUNG age of 18 or 19. </div>
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<span class="s1">Some people NEED to wait. (My dad did! But there was less pressure and it was less of a big deal to wait back then.) And, while I could get in some trouble for saying this, some people are better off not going at all (though I think that should be a decision made as a result of a lot of soul searching and guidance from God). </span></div>
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<span class="s1">But, back to comparisons: No matter what someone decides on this issue, to go on a mission or to not go, they will inevitably face societal judgements and pressures -- as well as inner doubt, fear, and inadequacy. (I have all kinds of stories on this topic...) And d</span>ealing with those types of situations and feelings are just part of making ANY big life decision because they all bring the seemingly inevitable comparisons.</div>
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<span class="s1">I've noticed that in my own life, having a strong spiritual confirmation is often the <i>only</i> thing I have to hold onto in the face of great inner uncertainty and the pressure of outer expectations. So </span>I rely on the experience of having the spirit confirm to me a choice.</div>
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<span class="s1">...And sometimes there isn't even that...and I just have to step out into "the dark" and trust that no matter what happens God will make good out of my choice.</span></div>
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<span class="s1">I believe most of our life choices (to go on missions, to go to college, to move here or there, to have kids, to take a certain job, etc etc) are NOT a matter of right and wrong. God can and will make good out of whatever we use our agency to choose, because he loves us. I think this is a big part of what the Atonement is.</span></div>
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<span class="s1">Obviously certain choices lead to certain consequences (and consequences can make the choice seem "good" or seem "bad") but consequences are just the result of living in a world where there is cause and effect and anyway, this is how we learn! Experience and understanding, whether it is hard or happy or whatever is GOOD (It's the purpose of life!) </span></div>
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<span class="s1">Learning how to let go of comparing is the best step to self-worth and peace, but it is a lifelong lesson. </span></div>
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<span class="s1">First is learning to keep our eye set on God. That means not looking side to side at each oth</span>er, but letting our "eye be single to [God's] glory, [that our] whole bodies shall be filled with light, and there shall be no darkness in [us]; and that body which is filled with light comprehendeth all things" -- including our own individual worth and path (D&C 88:67). </div>
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Second is remembering that in this life we "see through a glass, darkly" but there will come a time when we wont just "know in part" but will "know even as also [we are] known" (1 Corin. 13:12). God will reveal to us, line upon line, who we truly are and the our worth as individual members -- and we will see our selves as he sees us: without any type of comparison and uniquely precious and uniquely enough.<br />
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We "measure up" not because of how we are "similar or equivalent" to others, but because we are unique and because God loves us.<br />
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kirsthttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13230739583008991647noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5761403638561235036.post-59637670996731094642015-04-21T13:35:00.001-07:002015-04-21T14:18:25.843-07:00emotional health and powerIt's been a long time since I posted anything here.<br />
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Not because I haven't thought of things to write about -- because I <i>have</i> thought of a million things! I've read so many words that resonated and so much has happened! But... I was lazy.<br />
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I actually deeply regret that I didn't write about those million things, because it seems my thoughts, feelings, and insights, when left unrecorded or unprocessed through writing, seem to fade into faint recollections much faster and more irretrievably than I previously realized.<br />
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Today I decided I want to try and leave (cold-turkey!) that lazy fog that's hung around me the last few months. It helps that I have something extra intimate and heavy with personal vulnerability <a href="http://mobile.nytimes.com/blogs/well/2015/01/19/writing-your-way-to-happiness/?referrer=">to work through</a>, and this is my best venue. ;)<br />
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I've <a href="http://cakehats.blogspot.com/2009/12/blossoms.html">written</a> in the past <a href="http://cakehats.blogspot.com/2010/03/what-to-do-with-feelings.html">about feelings</a> and my own <a href="http://cakehats.blogspot.com/2010/02/emotion-of-body-and-mind.html">struggles to understand</a> my emotional life, and how to <a href="http://cakehats.blogspot.com/2010/08/emotion-processing-through-dreams.html">push it</a> and myself towards deeper maturation. It's been an ongoing quest. Fortunately, I've had good friends to talk to, <a href="https://www.lds.org/general-conference/2013/10/like-a-broken-vessel?lang=eng">spiritual resources</a> that lend insight, and a wealth of experiences in the last few years that have brought a lot of emotional growth via new comprehension and appreciation for the times when I feel all the feels.<br />
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One particular resource that, in combination with a few different experience that I will relate momentarily, really had a profound impact was an article from the <i>NY Times </i>entitled <a href="http://www.nytimes.com/2015/03/01/opinion/sunday/medicating-womens-feelings.html?fb_ref=Default&_r=0">"Medicating Women's Feelings"</a> that berated modern society for conditioning women to think that having feelings or being "moody" is undesirable and disabling -- and should be medicated away so that we can achieve the "new normal" of a life that is completely even-keeled. </div>
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"...we are under constant pressure to restrain our emotional lives. We have been taught to apologize for our tears, to suppress our anger and to fear being called hysterical."</blockquote>
Reading the author's argument for the natural and real place in our lives for emotion was liberating and empowering. The idea of embracing emotions which are so often termed as negative as just part of having a whole and complete emotional life i.e. "a healthy, adaptive part of our biology" resonated deeply with me, as did this compelling line that: "Women’s emotionality is a sign of health, not disease; it is a source of power."<br />
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After reading the article, I could't stop thinking about it, especially these parts: </div>
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"In the days leading up to menstruation, when emotional sensitivity is heightened, women may feel less insulated, more irritable or dissatisfied. I tell my patients that the thoughts and feelings that come up during this phase are genuine, and perhaps it’s best to re-evaluate what they put up with the rest of the month, when their hormone and neurotransmitter levels are more likely programmed to prompt them to be accommodating to others’ demands and needs."</blockquote>
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"Crying isn’t just about sadness. When we are scared, or frustrated, when we see injustice, when we are deeply touched by the poignancy of humanity, we cry. And some women cry more easily than others. It doesn’t mean we’re weak or out of control. At higher doses, S.S.R.I.s [<i>medications</i>] make it difficult to cry. They can also promote apathy and indifference. Change comes from the discomfort and awareness that something is wrong; we know what’s right only when we feel it. If medicated means complacent, it helps no one."</blockquote>
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The way that I understand this is that while biologically our hormones/emotions often lead us to focus on others' needs most of the time, when those levels shift (due to natural conditions such as PMS) and we are more sensitive, it becomes an opportunity to focus on oneself and learn where we can make changes to improve our overall emotional life. </div>
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For example, it is like how most of the time you don't mind a passive-agressive friend, except when you're sensitive because of circumstance X and then they really get to you. So, you revaluate your friendship with that person -- and perhaps make changes. When we are normally exposed to condition X (an environment, a person, even a TV show) we deal with it, but when we're especially sensitive and it finally gets to to us, it is an opportunity to say: "enough is enough." It's the push to stop exposing ourselves to that subtle wear and tear.</div>
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When we feel deep emotions in these sensitive times, it is because we have a special awareness and responsiveness that can serve as a tool for recognizing meaningful experiences, new insight, and opportunities for change and growth. </div>
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This is something I had begun to subtly understand in my own life, but since reading this article has burst open and given me a whole new perspective on my emotional self. For many years, as a teenager and in my early college years, I thought that something was wrong with me. I felt I would go from fine and normal to violently sensitive and without any control of my feelings. I finally identified it as being PMS (and then later as <a href="http://www.mayoclinic.org/diseases-conditions/premenstrual-syndrome/expert-answers/pmdd/faq-20058315">PMDD</a>) and from there was able to begin telling/reminding myself that these mood shifts were the result of hormones and <b>not</b> that something in me was broken and needed fixing. </div>
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This resulted in a lot of emotional development and great degree of stability and peace in my life. However, the monthly experience was still primarily negative until I began noticing that if I controlled what I was exposed to during this time it was significantly less negative. If I watched a good sad movie I could FEEL and CRY and get it all out, and not actually feel "bad." I could purposefully expose myself to touching media and wallow around it all the feelings (often sentimentality) it evoked versus being set-off by unexpected emotional punches. I could have some control!<br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgQgplu_-E_pEXRJmfaJanp3NsZ-KdW04oNbBjFrZ7k4spVrm3j6qEiwAglbqN3uuwyuPVYaun_b947h-pDgfoVPkm7SpO6zCIRs_UkBmb74OQb8ba9V5M-pAcvJBdUXmmWyoOivgNzDrQ/s1600/feel+all.jpeg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgQgplu_-E_pEXRJmfaJanp3NsZ-KdW04oNbBjFrZ7k4spVrm3j6qEiwAglbqN3uuwyuPVYaun_b947h-pDgfoVPkm7SpO6zCIRs_UkBmb74OQb8ba9V5M-pAcvJBdUXmmWyoOivgNzDrQ/s1600/feel+all.jpeg" /></a></div>
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This is about when I read the above article and finally realized it wasn't just about trying to control <i>how</i> I was going to feel those feels every month. The truth was, those few terrible/wonderful days every month were an opportunity to choose <i>how</i> <b>and</b> <i>what</i> I would feel <i>more deeply than everyday life typically entailed</i>, and glean new insight about those feelings and myself. </div>
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It wasn't just about trying to avoid what could cause downward spiral but learning to identify things in my life that were having a stronger effect on me (even if most of the month I handled them fine) and making adjustments. It wasn't just about avoiding the influence of condition X a few days of the month but recognizing and then managing the influence <i>every day</i> of the month.<br />
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I finally realized the experience of my emotions is more than just feels -- and what was once a monthly terror became a regular opportunity to better understand my fears, frustrations, passions, and dreams.</div>
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It has also become a chance to choose to take advantage of how deeply and comprehensively I feel things during those days -- and expose myself to conditions and experiences where drinking deeply of those emotions breaks my heart open in new and beautiful ways. As corny as it sounds, for me this means listening to touching and inspiring music, reading poignant and illuminating stories, writing letters to family and friends telling them how much I love them, etc. etc. -- and really thoroughly FEELING all of that. I watch commercials with babies and puppies and I cry. I look at photos from the day I married my husband and I cry. I write blog posts, sorting through insights about my self, and my life and I cry. I cry and it isn't about sadness. </div>
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And while I still experience times when I painfully feel TOO MUCH and it spirals out of control, I do eventually come back to myself and I look back with a newfound ability to learn from those difficult heart-wrenching swings. It helps that as more time passes the balance continues to shift and those times are less and less frequent.</div>
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But whatever comes, I get to choose to embrace what I feel and learn knowing that my "emotionality is a sign of health, not disease; it is a source of power."</div>
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kirsthttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13230739583008991647noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5761403638561235036.post-87425630715932997202014-12-10T12:46:00.000-08:002014-12-10T12:46:25.801-08:00a reposting: "in the image of stuff"<table border="0" cellpadding="20" cellspacing="0" style="-webkit-text-size-adjust: none; color: black; width: 100%px;"><tbody>
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<a href="http://us5.campaign-archive1.com/?u=45b75085e6ab57e339ea89d67&id=bab3bd6842&e=e3c40caa6d">Article</a> by Jill Carattini, managing editor of <em>A Slice of Infinity </em>at Ravi Zacharias International Ministries.</div>
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In the Image of Stuff</h3>
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I was on hold the other day trying to schedule an appointment for a hair cut. As I waited for the receptionist, I half-listened to the obligatory recordings. The announcer asked me to consider scheduling a make-over with my upcoming appointment and to make sure I leave with the products that will keep up my new look. (Apparently, when you have a captive audience of customers “muzak” is hardly strategic.) But I was then caught off guard by a question: “What do the local communities of Chad, Africa, mean to you?” The answer he offered was as immediate as my inability to think of one: “Chad is a leading producer of organic acacia gum, the vital ingredient in a new line of products exclusively produced for and available at our salon.”<br />
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In a culture dominated by consumption, the commodification of everything around us is becoming more and more of an unconscious worldview. Thus, when we think of Chad, we can think of our favorite shampoo and its connection with our hair salon. The land where it came from, the conditions of its production, and the community or laborers who produce it are realities wholly disassociated with the commodity. Like soap and luggage, the nation of Chad can become just one of the many commodities within our consumer mindset.<br />
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As I put down the phone, I couldn’t help but wonder about Amos’s description of those who are “at ease in Zion.” <em>How at ease do you have to be to begin to see the world in commodities?</em><br />
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In fact, at the time of Amos’s words, Israel itself was at one of its most opulent junctures. They had expanded their territory in more than one direction. Their winter palaces were adorned with ivory and their feasts were lacking nothing. They could be heard singing songs to the sound of the harp and seen anointing themselves with the finest of oils. It was in such affluence that the shepherd Amos proclaimed indomitably: “Woe to those who are at ease in Zion, and to those who feel secure on the mountain of Samaria” (Amos 6:1).<br />
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Though unpopular words to voice, Amos’s omen is far from isolated in ancient Scripture. While Amos compares the drunken women of Israel to the fat cows of Bashan, Micah describes the rich as men full of violence, and Jeremiah cites those with wealth and power as those who grow fat and sleek. Likewise, in the book of Revelation, the church that God wants to spit out of his mouth is the one who has “acquired wealth and needs nothing,” the one who has not realized that they are “wretched, pitiful, poor, blind and naked” (Revelation 3:17).<br />
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As G.K. Chesterton once noted, “Alas, it is impossible to have any sort of debate over whether or not Jesus believed that rich people were in big trouble—there is too much evidence on the subject and it is overwhelming.”(1) The pervasiveness of this evidence makes for a rough entry into the ongoing debate about the morality of affluence among Western Christians. Like Chesterton<em>,</em> I am at times uncomfortably aware at whom the words of Christ were aimed: <em>I am the rich Christian to whom Jesus speaks bluntly.</em><br />
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I am also among the crowd he takes the time and care to caution. Among his many words about money, Jesus warned, “Watch out! Be on your guard against all kinds of greed; a person’s life does not consist in the abundance of his possessions.”<br />
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How then might we live in a world of affluence? How might we fight the all-pervading atmosphere of consumerism and the attitude of commodification around us? How might we learn again to see our neighbors when they have become invisible behind our mountains of stuff? There is good reason for unrelenting words against the greed that turns communities into commodities and souls into consumers. There is similarly good reason that Christ has called the poor in spirit <em>blessed</em>, for those who cling to the Father know it is God alone they can eternally hold. We were not made to be at ease in Zion any more than we were made in the image of commodity. We were made in the image of God.<br />
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This God we now faintly resemble never sleeps or slumbers, perhaps in part because the suffering among us never sleep or slumber. It is this God who calls us to follow and to deny ourselves, to consider the “treasures” that might block our vision of God—as well as our vision of our neighbor. There are none seen as commodities in the eyes of the Creator; there are but children with the eyes of their Father.<br />
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kirsthttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13230739583008991647noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5761403638561235036.post-46268291280411082962014-12-09T12:29:00.000-08:002014-12-10T12:48:33.059-08:00timshell -- the meaning of wordsWords have meaning and the words we choose to use matter. As an English major and writing teacher I am obsessed with the purposeful use of language, of cultivating an awareness of what is used by others and why — as well as of your own choices and making sure they are deliberate. (It’s one of my “soapboxes”)<br />
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So, here is an example of how different words can have dramatically different implications:<br />
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John Steinbeck, <i>East of Eden</i></div>
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“Do you remember when you read us the sixteen verses of the fourth chapter of Genesis and we argued about them?”</div>
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“I do indeed. And that’s a long time ago.”</div>
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“Ten years nearly,” said Lee. “Well, the story bit deeply into me and I went into it word for word. The more I thought about the story, the more profound it became to me. Then I compared the translations we have—and they were fairly close. There was only one place that bothered me. The King James version says this—it is when Jehovah has asked Cain why he is angry. Jehovah says, ‘If thou doest well, shalt thou not be accepted? and if thou doest not well, sin lieth at the door. And unto thee shall be his desire, and thou shalt rule over him.’ It was the ‘thou shalt’ that struck me, because it was a promise that Cain would conquer sin.”</div>
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Samuel nodded. “And his children didn’t do it entirely,” he said.</div>
<div class="text" style="font-family: 'Times New Roman', Times; font-size: 15px; text-indent: 1em;">
Lee sipped his coffee. “Then I got a copy of the American Standard Bible. It was very new then. And it was different in this passage. It says, ‘Do thou rule over him.’ Now this is very different. This is not a promise, it is an order. And I began to stew about it. I wondered what the original word of the original writer had been that these very different translations could be made.”</div>
<div class="text" style="font-family: 'Times New Roman', Times; font-size: 15px; text-indent: 1em;">
Samuel put his palms down on the table and leaned forward and the old young light came into his eyes. “Lee,” he said, “don’t tell me you studied Hebrew!”</div>
<div class="text" style="font-family: 'Times New Roman', Times; font-size: 15px; text-indent: 1em;">
Lee said, “I’m going to tell you. And it’s a fairly long story. Will you have a touch of ng-ka-py?”</div>
<div class="text" style="font-family: 'Times New Roman', Times; font-size: 15px; text-indent: 1em;">
“You mean the drink that tastes of good rotten apples?”</div>
<div class="text" style="font-family: 'Times New Roman', Times; font-size: 15px; text-indent: 1em;">
“Yes. I can talk better with it.”</div>
<div class="text" style="font-family: 'Times New Roman', Times; font-size: 15px; text-indent: 1em;">
“Maybe I can listen better,” said Samuel.</div>
<div class="text" style="font-family: 'Times New Roman', Times; font-size: 15px; text-indent: 1em;">
While Lee went to the kitchen Samuel asked, “Adam, did you know about this?”</div>
<div class="text" style="font-family: 'Times New Roman', Times; font-size: 15px; text-indent: 1em;">
“No,” said Adam. “He didn’t tell me. Maybe I wasn’t listening.”</div>
<div class="text" style="font-family: 'Times New Roman', Times; font-size: 15px; text-indent: 1em;">
Lee came back with his stone bottle and three little porcelain cups so thin and delicate that the light shone through them. “Dlinkee Chinee fashion,” he said and poured the almost black liquor. “There’s a lot of wormwood in this. It’s quite a drink,” he said. “Has about the same effect as absinthe if you drink enough of it.”</div>
<div class="text" style="font-family: 'Times New Roman', Times; font-size: 15px; text-indent: 1em;">
Samuel sipped the drink. “I want to know why you were so interested,” he said.</div>
<div class="text" style="font-family: 'Times New Roman', Times; font-size: 15px; text-indent: 1em;">
“Well, it seemed to me that the man who could conceive this great story would know exactly what he wanted to say and there would be no confusion in his statement.”</div>
<div class="text" style="font-family: 'Times New Roman', Times; font-size: 15px; text-indent: 1em;">
“You say ‘the man.’ Do you then not think this is a divine book written by the inky finger of God?”</div>
<div class="text" style="font-family: 'Times New Roman', Times; font-size: 15px; text-indent: 1em;">
“I think the mind that could think this story was a curiously divine mind. We have had a few such minds in China too.”</div>
<div class="text" style="font-family: 'Times New Roman', Times; font-size: 15px; text-indent: 1em;">
“I just wanted to know,” said Samuel. “You’re not a Presbyterian after all.”</div>
<div class="text" style="font-family: 'Times New Roman', Times; font-size: 15px; text-indent: 1em;">
“I told you I was getting more Chinese. Well, to go on, I went to San Francisco to the headquarters of our family association. Do you know about them? Our great families have centers where any member can get help or give it. The Lee family is very large. It takes care of its own.”</div>
<div class="text" style="font-family: 'Times New Roman', Times; font-size: 15px; text-indent: 1em;">
“I have heard of them,” said Samuel.</div>
<div class="text" style="font-family: 'Times New Roman', Times; font-size: 15px; text-indent: 1em;">
“You mean Chinee hatchet man fightee Tong war over slave girl?”</div>
<div class="text" style="font-family: 'Times New Roman', Times; font-size: 15px; text-indent: 1em;">
“I guess so.”</div>
<div class="text" style="font-family: 'Times New Roman', Times; font-size: 15px; text-indent: 1em;">
“It’s a little different from that, really,” said Lee. “I went there because in our family there are a number of ancient reverend gentlemen who are great scholars. They are thinkers in exactness. A man may spend many years pondering a sentence of the scholar you call Confucius. I thought there might be experts in meaning who could advise me.</div>
<div class="text" style="font-family: 'Times New Roman', Times; font-size: 15px; text-indent: 1em;">
“They are fine old men. They smoke their two pipes of opium in the afternoon and it rests and sharpens them, and they sit through the night and their minds are wonderful. I guess no other people have been able to use opium well.”</div>
<div class="text" style="font-family: 'Times New Roman', Times; font-size: 15px; text-indent: 1em;">
Lee dampened his tongue in the black brew. “I respectfully submitted my problem to one of these sages, read him the story, and told him what I understood from it. The next night four of them met and called me in. We discussed the story all night long.”</div>
<div class="text" style="font-family: 'Times New Roman', Times; font-size: 15px; text-indent: 1em;">
Lee laughed. “I guess it’s funny,” he said. “I know I wouldn’t dare tell it to many people. Can you imagine four old gentlemen, the youngest is over ninety now, taking on the study of Hebrew? They engaged a learned rabbi. They took to the study as though they were children. Exercise books, grammar, vocabulary, simple sentences. You should see Hebrew written in Chinese ink with a brush! The right to left didn’t bother them as much as it would you, since we write up to down. Oh, they were perfectionists! They went to the root of the matter.”</div>
<div class="text" style="font-family: 'Times New Roman', Times; font-size: 15px; text-indent: 1em;">
“And you?” said Samuel.</div>
<div class="text" style="font-family: 'Times New Roman', Times; font-size: 15px; text-indent: 1em;">
“I went along with them, marveling at the beauty of their proud clean brains. I began to love my race, and for the first time I wanted to be Chinese. Every two weeks I went to a meeting with them, and in my room here I covered pages with writing. I bought every known Hebrew dictionary. But the old gentlemen were always ahead of me. It wasn’t long before they were ahead of our rabbi; he brought a colleague in. Mr. Hamilton, you should have sat through some of those nights of argument and discussion. The questions, the inspection, oh, the lovely thinking—the beautiful thinking.</div>
<div class="text" style="font-family: 'Times New Roman', Times; font-size: 15px; text-indent: 1em;">
“After two years we felt that we could approach your sixteen verses of the fourth chapter of Genesis. My old gentlemen felt that these words were very important too—‘Thou shalt’ and ‘Do thou.’ And this was the gold from our mining: ‘Thou mayest.’ ‘Thou mayest rule over sin.’ The old gentlemen smiled and nodded and felt the years were well spent. It brought them out of their Chinese shells too, and right now they are studying Greek.”</div>
<div class="text" style="font-family: 'Times New Roman', Times; font-size: 15px; text-indent: 1em;">
Samuel said, “It’s a fantastic story. And I’ve tried to follow and maybe I’ve missed somewhere. Why is this word so important?”</div>
<div class="text" style="font-family: 'Times New Roman', Times; font-size: 15px; text-indent: 1em;">
Lee’s hand shook as he filled the delicate cups. He drank his down in one gulp. “Don’t you see?” he cried. “The American Standard translation orders men to triumph over sin, and you can call sin ignorance. The King James translation makes a promise in ‘Thou shalt,’ meaning that men will surely triumph over sin. But the Hebrew word, the word timshel—‘Thou mayest’— that gives a choice. It might be the most important word in the world. That says the way is open. That throws it right back on a man. For if ‘Thou mayest’—it is also true that ‘Thou mayest not.’ Don’t you see?”</div>
<div class="text" style="font-family: 'Times New Roman', Times; font-size: 15px; text-indent: 1em;">
“Yes, I see. I do see. But you do not believe this is divine law. Why do you feel its importance?”</div>
<div class="text" style="font-family: 'Times New Roman', Times; font-size: 15px; text-indent: 1em;">
“Ah!” said Lee. “I’ve wanted to tell you this for a long time. I even anticipated your questions and I am well prepared. Any writing which has influenced the thinking and the lives of innumerable people is important. Now, there are many millions in their sects and churches who feel the order, ‘Do thou,’ and throw their weight into obedience. And there are millions more who feel predestination in ‘Thou shalt.’ Nothing they may do can interfere with what will be. But ‘Thou mayest’! Why, that makes a man great, that gives him stature with the gods, for in his weakness and his filth and his murder of his brother he has still the great choice. He can choose his course and fight it through and win.” Lee’s voice was a chant of triumph.</div>
<div class="text" style="font-family: 'Times New Roman', Times; font-size: 15px; text-indent: 1em;">
Adam said, “Do you believe that, Lee?”</div>
<div class="text" style="font-family: 'Times New Roman', Times; font-size: 15px; text-indent: 1em;">
“Yes, I do. Yes, I do. It is easy out of laziness, out of weakness, to throw oneself into the lap of deity, saying, ‘I couldn’t help it; the way was set.’ But think of the glory of the choice! That makes a man a man. A cat has no choice, a bee must make honey. There’s no godliness there. And do you know, those old gentlemen who were sliding gently down to death are too interested to die now?”</div>
<div class="text" style="font-family: 'Times New Roman', Times; font-size: 15px; text-indent: 1em;">
Adam said, “Do you mean these Chinese men believe the Old Testament?”</div>
<div class="text" style="font-family: 'Times New Roman', Times; font-size: 15px; text-indent: 1em;">
Lee said, “These old men believe a true story, and they know a true story when they hear it. They are critics of truth. They know that these sixteen verses are a history of humankind in any age or culture or race. They do not believe a man writes fifteen and three-quarter verses of truth and tells a lie with one verb. Confucius tells men how they should live to have good and successful lives. But this—this is a ladder to climb to the stars.” Lee’s eyes shone. “You can never lose that. It cuts the feet from under weakness and cowardliness and laziness.”</div>
<div class="text" style="font-family: 'Times New Roman', Times; font-size: 15px; text-indent: 1em;">
Adam said, “I don’t see how you could cook and raise the boys and take care of me and still do all this.”</div>
<div class="text" style="font-family: 'Times New Roman', Times; font-size: 15px; text-indent: 1em;">
“Neither do I,” said Lee. “But I take my two pipes in the afternoon, no more and no less, like the elders. And I feel that I am a man. And I feel that a man is a very important thing—maybe more important than a star. This is not theology. I have no bent toward gods. But I have a new love for that glittering instrument, the human soul. It is a lovely and unique thing in the universe. It is always attacked and never destroyed— because ‘Thou mayest.’”</div>
</div>
kirsthttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13230739583008991647noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5761403638561235036.post-51772211763215799332014-11-13T08:43:00.000-08:002014-11-13T09:03:22.680-08:00"An uncomprehensive, non-authoritative overview of the shifting nature of authority" The title of this post is that of post done by my good friend and fellow-blogger <a href="https://www.blogger.com/profile/03225818475891766351">marleerocker</a> that I want to transcribe here (w/the addition of my comments) because 1. her post is so good and 2. it enabled me to say a few things I've been thinking about lately. (Check it out the original post <a href="http://marleerocker.blogspot.com/2014/11/an-uncomprehensive-non-authoritative.html?showComment=1415827480147#c8096103595258461807">here</a> and feel free to read more of her awesome posts!)<br />
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<br />
<blockquote class="tr_bq" style="background-color: white; color: #666666; font-stretch: normal; margin: 0.75em 0px 0px; position: relative;">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif; font-size: large;"><b>An uncomprehensive, non-authoritative overview of the shifting nature of authority</b></span></blockquote>
<blockquote class="tr_bq" style="background-color: white; color: #666666; font-stretch: normal; margin: 0.75em 0px 0px; position: relative;">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Looking at religious or political Facebook arguments through the lens of authority and power struggles can be very useful.<br /><br />It's impossible to overestimate the impact two consecutive World Wars and decades of living with the threat of nuclear holocaust had on the American psyche. Two catastrophic wars followed by over a decade of living under constant paranoia - Google search the effects of prolonged stress and fear, now apply that to a population of millions.</span><span style="background-color: transparent;"> </span></blockquote>
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<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">When I teach a History class about the 1960's I like to teach it in context of what preceded it. At some point people get tired of being told to be afraid and tired of allowing a few men in power to send millions to the gas chambers and the trenches - and in large measure, the hippie or counter culture revolution that revolved around anti-war sentiment, was a massive shrugging off the weight of this fear and powerlessness. It's important to note that the baby boomers - turned hippies grew into adulthood during the 50's. They had to be affected by the contradiction of the constant presence of threat of war in a time of relative peace with no first hand exposure to a conflict like the ones their parents and grandparents weathered.</span><span style="background-color: transparent;"> </span></blockquote>
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<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">The net result was a deep abiding societal mistrust and contempt for authority.<br />...that continues to today and permeates political and religious rhetoric.<br />Would you agree that:</span><span style="background-color: transparent;"> </span></blockquote>
<blockquote class="tr_bq" style="background-color: white; color: #666666; font-stretch: normal; margin: 0.75em 0px 0px; position: relative;">
<br />
<ul>
<li><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">A lot of people are worried about the corruption in the government?</span></li>
<li><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">A lot of people are unwilling to listen to take advice from just anyone?</span></li>
<li><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">A lot of people are leaving the religions they were raised in?</span></li>
<li><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">A lot of people subconsciously walk around with the attitude that is the equivalent of saying, "You don' <i><b>know</b></i> ME!" unwilling to legitimize opposing viewpoints, criticism or rejection?</span><span style="background-color: transparent;"> </span></li>
</ul>
</blockquote>
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<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">IMHO - The nature of authority has evolved in such a way that it requires a level of consent and compliance unprecedented in human history; and in a connected, affluent society it has never been more difficult to acquire and maintain.</span><span style="background-color: transparent;"> </span></blockquote>
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<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Everyone wants to be</span><span style="background-color: transparent;"> </span><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">their own authority. I think the Bible describes it well in 2 Timothy:</span></blockquote>
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<blockquote class="tr_bq">
<i><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">1 This know also, that in the last days perilous times shall come. </span><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">2 For men shall be lovers of their own selves, covetous, boasters, proud, blasphemers, disobedient to parents, unthankful, unholy, </span><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">3 Without natural affection, truce-breakers, false accusers, incontinent, fierce, despisers of those that are good, </span></i><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><i>4 Traitors, heady, high-minded, lovers of pleasures more than lovers of God;</i></span></blockquote>
</blockquote>
<span style="background-color: white; color: #666666; font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">That being said, shirking the confines of an assumed authority is not necessarily a bad thing.</span><br />
<blockquote class="tr_bq" style="background-color: white; color: #666666; font-stretch: normal; margin: 0.75em 0px 0px; position: relative;">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">It's not as if people are disillusioned with authority without strong reason; we are well acquainted with the devastating impact of abuse or misuse of power - you don't have to look far to find child abuse, genocide, police brutality, corporate fraud, etc. And history is riddled with proof that power corrupts and absolute power corrupts absolutely.</span><span style="background-color: transparent;"> </span></blockquote>
<blockquote class="tr_bq" style="background-color: white; color: #666666; font-stretch: normal; margin: 0.75em 0px 0px; position: relative;">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Growing up in the fog of cynicism and witnesses to the human suffering incurred by unbridled and unchecked power, is it any wonder people are unwilling to be vulnerable and to put their trust in power given to other humans?<br />Furthermore, it turns out that as a free moral agents, challenging authority is a civic duty.</span><span style="background-color: transparent;"> </span></blockquote>
<blockquote class="tr_bq" style="background-color: white; color: #666666; font-stretch: normal; margin: 0.75em 0px 0px; position: relative;">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Brigham Young <a href="http://scriptures.byu.edu/gettalk.php?ID=488" style="color: #073763; font-weight: normal; text-decoration: none;" target="_blank">himself</a> said:</span><span style="background-color: transparent;"> </span></blockquote>
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<blockquote class="tr_bq">
<i><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">“I am more afraid that this people have so much</span><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">confidence in their leaders that they will not inquire for</span><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">themselves of God whether they are being led by him. I</span><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">am fearful they settle down in a state of blind security,</span><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">trusting their eternal destiny in the hands of their leaders</span><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">with a reckless confidence that in itself would thwart the</span><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">purposes of God in their salvation, and weaken that</span><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">influence they could give their leaders if they know for</span><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">themselves by the revelations of Jesus Christ that they</span><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">are led in the right way. Let every man and woman know</span><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">by the whisperings of the Spirit of God to themselves</span><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">whether their leaders are walking in the way the Lord</span><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">dictates or not.”</span></i></blockquote>
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Un-examined trust in ANY authority, even one previously found to be moral and correct can lead to moral degeneration and is an abdication of personal responsibility. Use your agency to select which authority you accept in your life, and by all means you should accept it from somewhere. That being said, I also want to make a case for why every free moral agent should hone their capacity to think critically and evaluate the authority figures and institutions that wield power over their lives and if necessary reject them in part or in full.</span><span style="background-color: transparent;"> </span></blockquote>
<blockquote class="tr_bq" style="background-color: white; color: #666666; font-stretch: normal; margin: 0.75em 0px 0px; position: relative;">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">In one of my favorite books, "Choices Under Fire; Moral Dimensions of World War II" the author Michael Bess draws relevant conclusions from a psychological experiment many of you will be familiar with. The experiment consisted of actors hired to be scientists and students and test subjects who were assigned the roll of teacher. They were to administer a test and for each wrong answer give the student a progressively more intrusive and painful "shock". Many of the test subjects protested but persisted under the direction of the scientist who insisted they continue. In short, they were willing to inflict severe harm upon other humans - sometimes past the point of suspected unconsciousness or heart failure - based on the authority they perceived in the person telling them to continue. Bess quotes one subject's response from the actual transcript:</span></blockquote>
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<i><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">'Mr. Renseeler: No, I can't continue. I'm sorry...I know what shocks do to you. I'm an electrical engineer, and I have had shocks... </span><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Experimenter: It is absolutely essential that you continue. </span><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Mr. Rensaleer: Well, I won't - not with the man screaming to get out. </span><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Experimenter: You have no other choice. </span><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Mr. Rensaleer: I <span style="font-weight: normal;">do</span> have a choice (<span style="font-weight: normal;">Incredulous and indignant.)</span> Why don't I have a choice? I came here on my own free will. I thought I could help in a research project. But if I have to hurt somebody to do that, or if I was in his place, too, I wouldn't stay there. I can't continue. I'm very sorry. I think I've gone too far already, probably.' </span></i></blockquote>
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Here was a classic case of "<b style="font-weight: normal;">disruptive empathy</b>" at work. Rensaleer's reliance on critical reason to assess the situation and reject the scientist's assurances; his ability to put himself in the other man's shoes ("I know what shocks do to you"); his appeal to higher moral principles ("If I have to hurt somebody to do that..."); his unshakable confidence in his own free will; his willingness to submit his own behavior to stern moral scrutiny ("I think I've gone too far already")' his forceful rupture of the situations momentum, breaking the facade of normality by crying foul after a certain line had been crossed - all these elements paint a portrait of a highly evolved moral agent..."</span><span style="background-color: transparent;"> </span></blockquote>
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<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">For someone who is religious this can be a very difficult paradox to navigate. How do I submit to religious authority and, at the same time, maintain my ability to evaluate it objectively and reject it if necessary (if only in part)? How do I defend the legitimacy of religious authority in a climate of such resentment and distrust towards it, and at the same time acknowledge that opponents may have valid points since, even in my own religion's history there are copious examples of the misuse and error of authority?</span><span style="background-color: transparent;"> </span></blockquote>
<blockquote class="tr_bq" style="background-color: white; color: #666666; font-stretch: normal; margin: 0.75em 0px 0px; position: relative;">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">It requires great effort, personal integrity, humility and honesty to maintain a capacity to fairly scrutinize external authority. That, perhaps, is the work of refining your soul. On the other hand, it takes only self-righteousness and pride to flatly reject OR <i style="font-weight: normal;">accept </i>religious authority and then put all of your effort into developing your position with clever arguments and justifications.</span><span style="background-color: transparent;"> </span></blockquote>
<blockquote class="tr_bq" style="background-color: white; color: #666666; font-stretch: normal; margin: 0.75em 0px 0px; position: relative;">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">The first step is to be aware. Be aware of biases and the attitudes towards authority that we inherit from our parents and the past. Know enough history to understand why completely submitting to authority is dangerous for you and everyone else, and how disrupting existing power structures can also cause unnecessary societal upheaval. Develop a tolerance for ambiguity and cognitive dissonance. Take a deep breath. Relax. Use the intellectual talent that God has given you, nurture and develop it. Reach for greater knowledge, goodness and wisdom. Above all else love. Peace and love.</span><span style="background-color: transparent;"> </span></blockquote>
<blockquote class="tr_bq" style="background-color: white; color: #666666; font-stretch: normal; margin: 0.75em 0px 0px; position: relative;">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">I have a deep appreciation for the idealistic contribution of the "revolutionaries" in the 1960's. Perhaps they fell short of their goal to reshape the world in their own image of community, equality, and peace. But their legacy lives on anytime anyone ever updates their Facebook status to raise difficult questions about the merit and validity of current power structures and whether or not they should be changed.</span></blockquote>
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<br />
My response to her post (i.e. our ensuing conversation as of the time I published this post):<br />
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<cite class="user" style="font-style: normal; font-weight: bold;"><a href="http://www.blogger.com/profile/13230739583008991647" rel="nofollow" style="color: #073763; text-decoration: none;">kirst</a></cite><span class="icon user" style="font-weight: bold;"></span><span class="datetime secondary-text" style="margin-left: 6px;"><a href="http://marleerocker.blogspot.com/2014/11/an-uncomprehensive-non-authoritative.html?showComment=1415811132189#c6389485134704384441" rel="nofollow" style="color: #073763; text-decoration: none;">November 12, 2014 at 8:52 AM</a></span></div>
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So many thoughts!<br />
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First of all: "Growing up in the fog of cynicism and witnesses to the human suffering incurred by unbridled and unchecked power, is it any wonder people are unwilling to be vulnerable and to put their trust in power given to other humans?" THIS IS SO TRUE. I think about it a lot because of how exposed we are (thanks to the internet) to the world (to good things like funny cat videos and to bad things like ISIS beheadings). Every day almost the entire world is on display and I am bombarded by human suffering via news articles, facebook posts, email fwds, etc. It certainly makes me retreat back into my protective habit of just not clicking, not reading, not listening to things -- as well as to feel more and more helpless and hopeless. (Some days it seems there just aren't enough "Faith In Humanity Restored" articles to make up for all the "I Don't Want To Live On This Planet Anymore" articles.)<br />
<br />
Secondly, this post totally resonated with my thoughts on how often we tend to either give up personal responsibility to follow authority blindly OR totally abandon all authority to live solely on our own personal compass. Why? Because it is EASIER than having to always figure out who to follow, what to listen to, and how to align our sense of right/wrong with what we are told. That is a lot of work! If we just blindly follow we don't have to put for any effort to validate what we are told and we have someone to blame other than ourselves when everything goes sour (no personal responsibility there!). Also, just letting go of authority makes everything so subjective, so there is less need to worry about being "right" so much as feeling good. Again, less work to do and less weight of significance. I think this is why things are getting more and more polarized -- more and more people are just giving up and taking the path of least resistance.<br />
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Which leads me to your statement "It requires great effort, personal integrity, humility and honesty to maintain a capacity to fairly scrutinize external authority. That, perhaps, is the work of refining your soul. On the other hand, it takes only self-righteousness and pride to flatly reject OR accept religious authority and then put all of your effort into developing your position with clever arguments and justifications."<br />
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Someone once told me they despised apologetics for this reason -- that it is basically just people trying to justify their position. In a way, I have begun to agree with this because I can see how people will decide to stick to an authority based solely on the fact that it is an authority, without personal effort to explore and question, and then from blind obedience seek to justify their position. However, I also think there are those for whom their "apologetics" are not just them seeking justification, but instead are seeking to find balance in cognitive dissonance and, like you said, "use the intellectual talent that God has given [them], nurture and develop it. Reach for greater knowledge, goodness and wisdom." What they end up with is a kind of justification, sure, but it is personal, intimate, assurance for them to trust an authority in a certain regard -- which isn't always a bad thing. Sometimes trust in something/someone beyond ourselves is a good path.<br />
<br />
Again, I guess it all comes down to asking yourself:<br />
Why do I trust?<br />
Why do I doubt? </div>
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<img src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjPyc46ec69-ptJgsxowf6BjpunAo0CzIPiaZixh80gt5nFE24Yv9MiixlZdfMv0DezVLKRfilFkLXoFoY1xorZgC7QSAmcHQgx7ZjYMa9-cHYJY_L0jz6FXV33A-PGqyi-nRqnbn4NATA/s45/*" style="border: 1px solid rgb(238, 238, 238); max-width: 36px;" /><cite class="user blog-author" style="font-style: normal; font-weight: bold; line-height: 16.7999992370605px;"><a href="http://www.blogger.com/profile/03225818475891766351" rel="nofollow" style="color: #073763; text-decoration: none;">marleerocker</a></cite><span class="icon user blog-author" style="line-height: 16.7999992370605px;"></span><span class="datetime secondary-text" style="line-height: 16.7999992370605px; margin-left: 6px;"><a href="http://marleerocker.blogspot.com/2014/11/an-uncomprehensive-non-authoritative.html?showComment=1415844914453#c3333303345717783153" rel="nofollow" style="color: #073763; text-decoration: none;">November 12, 2014 at 6:15 PM</a></span><br />
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I'm so glad you made that point. I think I meant to exclude apologists, or anyone who sincerely acknowledges weaknesses in their position and/or the validity of opposing arguments, when I said "flatly" but I should have developed that idea more.<br />
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I think what I find "unintegritable" if I can make up that word, is when people spend all their energy justifying what turns out to be more of an emotional reaction (motivated by (self) righteous indignation/pride) than a well-thought out conclusion.</div>
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<cite class="user" style="font-style: normal; font-weight: bold;"><a href="http://www.blogger.com/profile/13230739583008991647" rel="nofollow" style="color: #073763; text-decoration: none;">kirst</a></cite><span class="icon user" style="font-weight: bold;"></span><span class="datetime secondary-text" style="margin-left: 6px;"><a href="http://marleerocker.blogspot.com/2014/11/an-uncomprehensive-non-authoritative.html?showComment=1415897723329#c3632518696418576587" rel="nofollow" style="color: #073763; text-decoration: none;">November 13, 2014 at 8:55 AM</a></span></blockquote>
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Absolutely. I think it's human nature to feel defensive of our positions, without taking the time to thinking critically about their origin. (When we do, we often find most of our opinions are based in some sort of personal experience, which garnered some sort of strong emotion, which cemented our idea of that experience as personal truth.)<br />
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<span style="line-height: 16.7999992370605px; text-align: justify;">*and personal truth needs to be more than just emotion and experience; there has to be logic, reasoning, and even connections to outside sources as backup to bring us to a "well thought out conclusion" that is comprehensive enough to come close to "truth."</span></div>
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<cite class="user" style="font-style: normal; font-weight: bold;"><a href="http://www.blogger.com/profile/13230739583008991647" rel="nofollow" style="color: #073763; text-decoration: none;">kirst</a></cite><span class="icon user" style="font-weight: bold;"></span><span class="datetime secondary-text" style="margin-left: 6px;"><a href="http://marleerocker.blogspot.com/2014/11/an-uncomprehensive-non-authoritative.html?showComment=1415827480147#c8096103595258461807" rel="nofollow" style="color: #073763; text-decoration: none;">November 12, 2014 at 1:24 PM</a></span></div>
<div class="comment-content" id="bc_0_2MC" style="margin-bottom: 8px; text-align: justify;">
Also: since I know where some of your post is coming from I want to recommend this: <a href="http://www.patheos.com/blogs/kiwimormon/2014/02/a-former-bishops-doctrinal-dilemmas/">http://www.patheos.com/blogs/kiwimormon/2014/02/a-former-bishops-doctrinal-dilemmas/</a><br />
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(Ahh! The last line! ‘Isn’t it interesting that today’s challenge to our faith is coming directly from the church?’)</div>
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kirsthttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13230739583008991647noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5761403638561235036.post-91598944010842756322014-10-07T08:49:00.002-07:002014-10-07T08:49:18.861-07:00Ye Elders of Israel
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It’s amazing to think of the power it takes to convince so many 18/19/20 year olds to do everything it requires to serve a full time mission. That is a lot of sacrifice, suffering, and hard work from what is often thought of as a primarily self-absorbed and still-immature age group. </div>
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You get a sense of that power in this performance. It's beautiful. </div>
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kirsthttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13230739583008991647noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5761403638561235036.post-28217564142167751342014-10-01T08:26:00.003-07:002014-10-01T08:26:59.394-07:00my response to a Q on fbook<div class="_5pbx userContent" data-ft="{"tn":"K"}" style="background-color: white; color: #141823; font-family: Helvetica, Arial, 'lucida grande', tahoma, verdana, arial, sans-serif; font-size: 14px; line-height: 1.38; overflow: hidden;">
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Question. Everyone talks about Gods timetable being better than our own, how does free agency work into that?</div>
<span class="userContentSecondary _c24" style="color: #4e5665;"> — <img alt="" class="_51mq img" height="16" src="https://fbstatic-a.akamaihd.net/rsrc.php/v2/yY/r/C0uguJ2KeZW.png" style="border: 0px; margin-right: 3px; vertical-align: -2.9px;" width="16" />feeling lost.</span></div>
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<span data-reactid=".1l.1:3:1:$comment10152745531538923_10152746194923923:0.0.$right.0.$left.0.0.$author"><a class="UFICommentActorName" data-ft="{"tn":";"}" data-hovercard="/ajax/hovercard/hovercard.php?id=1295809183&extragetparams=%7B%22hc_location%22%3A%22ufi%22%7D" data-reactid=".1l.1:3:1:$comment10152745531538923_10152746194923923:0.0.$right.0.$left.0.0.$author.0" dir="ltr" href="https://www.facebook.com/kirstenmarienielsen?fref=ufi" style="color: #3b5998; cursor: pointer; font-weight: bold; text-decoration: none;">Kirsten Marie Nielsen</a></span><span data-reactid=".1l.1:3:1:$comment10152745531538923_10152746194923923:0.0.$right.0.$left.0.0.1:0"> </span><span data-ft="{"tn":"K"}" data-reactid=".1l.1:3:1:$comment10152745531538923_10152746194923923:0.0.$right.0.$left.0.0.1:$comment-body">from how I understand it, we have agency precisely because we are unable to accurately determine the state of the future. the principle of uncertainty (due to many things, including the limitations of language and our ability to perceive the world) gives us the opportunity to make choices, not based on knowing how things are actually going to turn out, but instead based on who we are (what we choose is a reflection of our inner selves -- what we value and believe). The idea of God "having a better timetable" is simply a mechanism for allowing more of our choices to reflect faith in God as opposed to being all happenstance or predisposition (i.e. it helps people feel like there is some certainty out there).</span></div>
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kirsthttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13230739583008991647noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5761403638561235036.post-87519165067625185972014-09-23T11:08:00.000-07:002014-09-23T11:12:51.986-07:00a Sufjan Stevens quoteSufjan Stevens talks about his relationship with his Christianity in <a href="http://thequietus.com/articles/05085-the-age-of-adz-sufjan-stevens-interview">an interview</a>:<br />
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<i>It’s the most important thing to me really but it’s also really important I don’t get too caught up in it. There’s a necessity for casualness, you know, because I think fear and anxiety are not elements in faith. And I think doubt is important and questioning and all that. I think there’s been too much made from fear and condemnation to manipulate people. I think that’s an atrocity really.</i></blockquote>
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<iframe allowfullscreen="" frameborder="0" height="315" src="//www.youtube.com/embed/cOaB7zD94J8" width="420"></iframe>kirsthttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13230739583008991647noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5761403638561235036.post-75578231229536493082014-08-01T12:25:00.000-07:002014-08-01T12:25:20.650-07:00The hope of God's lightThis is beautiful:<div>
<br /><a href="https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2w49_1a9X0Q"><iframe allowfullscreen="" frameborder="0" height="315" src="//www.youtube.com/embed/2w49_1a9X0Q" width="560"></iframe></a><br /><br /><br />I especially loved this part:<br /><blockquote class="tr_bq">
“I realized that it is part of our condition as mortals to sometimes feel as though we are surrounded by darkness. That even though we may feel lost, that God promises to illuminate the way before us, no matter how long it takes. </blockquote>
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For two years God had nurtured a questioning soul. Little by little he had given me as much as I could handle, until the day I was humble enough to hear fully what he wanted to tell me.”</blockquote>
<br />And this YouTube comment:<blockquote class="tr_bq">
That whole story is miraculous as well, but not in the lightning bolt kind of way. Which I think is the whole point. <b>God is there, waiting for us. But he has a process in which he fills our lives with light so that it means something to us. So that it sticks and actually makes real change in our lives.</b> So good to hear that you feel gradually better. You have to just keep nourishing that and seeking it out. I know you'll do that, <b>because now you know the difference between life with it and life without it.</b> That's a very beautiful story you've told. It really is all about just not giving up and staying with it until you have the breakthroughs you're meant to have. </blockquote>
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kirsthttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13230739583008991647noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5761403638561235036.post-37270230576099871612014-06-30T14:35:00.005-07:002014-06-30T15:00:01.414-07:00death<span style="font-family: Times, Times New Roman, serif;">I don't know why, but lately I've been thinking about death.</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Times, Times New Roman, serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: Times, Times New Roman, serif;">One of the most touching reflections on life and death that I have seen is the movie <i>Wit</i> (based on a play of the same name by Margaret Edson). It is about Vivian Bearing, "a strong woman, a John Donne scholar, a college professor and a cancer patient who is dying. And you are invited to watch her do it" (<a href="http://web.mnstate.edu/provost/death_dying_wit.pdf">source</a>).</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Times, Times New Roman, serif;">I watch this movie at least once every year, because despite how difficult it is to watch, "there is an undercurrent of hope in this movie—and it comes through the kindness of strangers and long lost friends" (<a href="http://web.mnstate.edu/provost/death_dying_wit.pdf">source</a>). </span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Times, Times New Roman, serif;"><br /></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Times, Times New Roman, serif;">The film focuses particularly on a poem from 17th century by the metaphysical poet John Donne (please read it slowly and try to understand what Donne is saying): </span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Times, Times New Roman, serif;"><br /></span></div>
<b><span style="font-family: Times, Times New Roman, serif;">Death Be Not Proud</span></b><br />
<span style="font-family: Times, Times New Roman, serif;"><br />
Death be not proud, though some have called thee </span><br />
<span style="font-family: Times, Times New Roman, serif;">Mighty and dreadful, for thou art not so, </span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Times, Times New Roman, serif;">For those whom thou think’st thou dost overthrow, </span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Times, Times New Roman, serif;">Die not, poor death, nor yet canst thou kill me. </span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Times, Times New Roman, serif;">From rest and sleep, which but thy pictures be, </span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Times, Times New Roman, serif;">Much pleasure, then from thee, much more must flow, </span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Times, Times New Roman, serif;">And soonest our best men with thee do go, </span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Times, Times New Roman, serif;">Rest of their bones, and soul’s delivery. </span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Times, Times New Roman, serif;">Thou art slave to Fate, Chance, kings, and desperate men, </span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Times, Times New Roman, serif;">And dost with poison, war, and sickness dwell, </span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Times, Times New Roman, serif;">And poppy, or charms can make us sleep as well, </span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Times, Times New Roman, serif;">And better than thy stroke; why swell’st thou then? </span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Times, Times New Roman, serif;">One short sleep past, we wake eternally, </span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Times, Times New Roman, serif;">And death shall be no more, death thou shalt die.</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Times, Times New Roman, serif;"><br /></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Times, Times New Roman, serif;">To explain further, I want to include a excerpt from the film. This video shows Vivian reflecting on a conversation she had with her mentor E.M. Ashford. Ashford explains the poem is about a simple human truth:</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Times, Times New Roman, serif;"><iframe allowfullscreen="" frameborder="0" height="315" src="//www.youtube.com/embed/FXpl_yvmKKA" width="420"></iframe></span></div>
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<span style="font-size: xx-small;"><a href="https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FXpl_yvmKKA">(direct link)</a></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Times, Times New Roman, serif;"><br /></span></div>
<span style="font-family: Times, 'Times New Roman', serif; font-size: x-small;">*Here is a transcription of the most important portion of their conversation, in case the video doesn't work:</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Times, Times New Roman, serif; font-size: x-small;">
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<blockquote class="tr_bq">
<span style="font-family: Times, Times New Roman, serif;"><span style="font-size: x-small;"><b>E.M. Ashford: </b>Do you think that the punctuation of the last line of this sonnet is merely an insignificant detail? The sonnet begins with a valiant struggle with Death calling on all the forces of intellect and drama to vanquish the enemy. But it is ultimately about overcoming the seemingly insuperable barriers separating life death and eternal life. In the edition you choose, this profoundly simple meaning is sacrificed to hysterical punctuation:</span> </span></blockquote>
<blockquote class="tr_bq">
<span style="font-family: Times, Times New Roman, serif;"><span style="font-size: x-small;">"And Death, Capital D, shall be no more, semi-colon. Death, Capital D comma, thou shalt die, exclamation mark!"</span> </span></blockquote>
<blockquote class="tr_bq">
<span style="font-family: Times, Times New Roman, serif;"><span style="font-size: x-small;">If you go in for this sort of thing I suggest you take up Shakespeare. </span><span style="font-size: x-small;">Gardner’s edition of the Holy Sonnets returns to the Westmoreland manuscript of 1610, not for sentimental reasons I assure you, but because Helen Gardner is a scholar. </span><span style="font-size: x-small;">It reads:</span> </span></blockquote>
<blockquote class="tr_bq">
<span style="font-family: Times, Times New Roman, serif;"><span style="font-size: x-small;">“And death shall be no more” comma “death, thou shalt die.” </span> </span></blockquote>
<blockquote class="tr_bq">
<span style="font-family: Times, Times New Roman, serif;"><span style="font-size: x-small;">Nothing but a breath, a comma separates life from life everlasting.</span> </span></blockquote>
<blockquote class="tr_bq">
<span style="font-family: Times, Times New Roman, serif;"><span style="font-size: x-small;">Very simple, really. With the original punctuation restored Death is no longer something to act out on a stage with exclamation marks. It is a comma. A pause. </span><span style="font-size: x-small;">In this way, the uncompromising way one learns something from the poem, wouldn’t you say? Life, death, soul, God, past, present. Not insuperable barriers. Not semi-colons. Just a comma.</span></span></blockquote>
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<span style="font-family: Times, Times New Roman, serif;"><br /></span></div>
<span style="font-family: Times, Times New Roman, serif;">While death is significant, it is not and end-all permanent stopping point. Like a comma, it changes the pace as we pause at it, but that is not all there is; we see the comma, and know there is more, and onward we go.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Times, Times New Roman, serif;"><br /></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Times, Times New Roman, serif;">This is especially true within the context of the gospel of Christ. Through our understanding of the basic principles of the gospel we see that there is more and that we can move ever onward:</span></div>
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<blockquote class="tr_bq">
<span style="font-family: Times, Times New Roman, serif;">“For God so loved the world, that he gave his only begotten Son, that whosoever believeth in him should not perish, but have everlasting life.” (<a href="https://www.lds.org/scriptures/nt/john/3.16-17?lang=eng#15">John 3:16</a>.)</span></blockquote>
<span style="font-family: Times, Times New Roman, serif;">Once we have calibrated our direction through belief and devotion to the Savior, a change of pace does not keep us from our destination. We only pause and step through to the next phase. The scriptures explain beautifully how this works:</span></div>
<blockquote class="tr_bq">
<span style="font-family: Times, Times New Roman, serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: Times, Times New Roman, serif;">17 Wherefore, do the things which I have told you I have seen that your Lord and your Redeemer should do; for, for this cause have they been shown unto me, that ye might know the gate by which ye should enter. For the gate by which ye should enter is repentance and baptism by water; and then cometh a remission of your sins by fire and by the Holy Ghost.</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Times, Times New Roman, serif;">18 And then are ye in this strait and narrow path which leads to eternal life; yea, ye have entered in by the gate; ye have done according to the commandments of the Father and the Son; and ye have received the Holy Ghost, which witnesses of the Fatherand the Son, unto the fulfilling of the promise which he hath made, that if ye entered in by the way ye should receive.</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Times, Times New Roman, serif;">19 And now, my beloved brethren, after ye have gotten into this strait and narrow path, I would ask if all is done? Behold, I say unto you, Nay; for ye have not come thus far save it were by the word of Christ with unshaken faith in him, relying wholly upon the merits of him who is mighty to save.</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Times, Times New Roman, serif;">20 Wherefore, ye must press forward with a steadfastness in Christ, having a perfect brightness of hope, and a love of God and of all men. Wherefore, if ye shall press forward, feasting upon the word of Christ, and endure to the end, behold, thus saith the Father: Ye shall have eternal life. <a href="https://www.lds.org/scriptures/bofm/2-ne/31.17-20?lang=eng#16">(2 Nephi 31:17-20)</a></span></blockquote>
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<span style="font-family: Times, Times New Roman, serif;">Even though the verse uses the wording to "endure to the end" it isn't the end, it's only the end of one phrase, a train of thought that then continues.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Times, Times New Roman, serif;"><br /></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Times, Times New Roman, serif;">And this meant to <b><u>be</u></b> something to us, which is described well in this story:</span></div>
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<blockquote class="tr_bq">
<span style="font-family: Times, Times New Roman, serif;"><i>I have a good friend that has a daughter. This daughter, we will call her J, has been terrified of water since she was very young. As J grew older she continued to dislike getting wet. She had a particular phobia of putting her head under the water. My friend and her husband did all the usual things, talked to her about it, regularly took her to the pool, did swim lessons but the intense fear remained. As J approached the age of eight her parents became concerned about how J would feel about being baptized. J approached them and told her parents that she wanted to be baptized but she was still terrified of going all the way into the water. They prayed together as a family that J would be able to have the comfort and assurance she needed. As the day grew closer, J was still feeling anxious so they asked a wider circle of family and friends to pray and fast. At J’s baptism, J was afraid but harnessing a huge amount of faith and trust she went into the water and was baptized. A year later I had J in my primary class. We were discussing baptism and J shared that while she had been afraid she felt that God was proud of what she was choosing to do and that gave her strength.</i> </span></blockquote>
<blockquote class="tr_bq">
<span style="font-family: Times, Times New Roman, serif;"><i>While I think while many of us probably do not have the same sort of fear and trepidation with water that J had, I think a whole lot of us may have a good amount of fear and uncertainty about death. Death is the great unknown. It’s scary. It will happen to all of us and to the people we love.</i> </span></blockquote>
<blockquote class="tr_bq">
<span style="font-family: Times, Times New Roman, serif;"><i>As I’ve talked to many people about their baptisms, I’ve been impressed by how often many feel filled by the Love of God. There is an outpouring of the spirit. A great sense that God recognizes us in that time and is “well pleased” with our efforts and decision, following the same pattern Jesus Christ established when he began his earthly ministry with baptism. (Matthew 3: 16-17)</i> </span></blockquote>
<blockquote class="tr_bq">
<span style="font-family: Times, Times New Roman, serif;"><i>Reverse engineering the symbolism, I like to believe that death will be a similar time for us. It will be a time that God welcomes us and receives us with Love and approval.<br />Historically,many in the Western world have believed that death is a dark night or even worse, a time of fire and brimstone and suffering for even the most helpless and innocent. In our time, I believe there are many that are uncertain or feel that there is an empty nothingness or haunted ghostly loneliness when we die. I believe that what we learn in our experiences of baptism refute these beliefs with an inspiring hope </i>(<a href="http://www.the-exponent.com/relief-society-lesson-13-baptism/">source</a>).</span></blockquote>
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<span style="font-family: Times, Times New Roman, serif;">Understanding and experiencing baptism, at it's core a kind of death and rebirth, can reacquaint us with the "inspiring hope" that can overcome uncertainty and fear. In this regard, death is meant to be the end of our sins, our past life. Death is a kind of progression (as we learn by studying the plan of salvation). </span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Times, Times New Roman, serif;"><br /></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Times, Times New Roman, serif;">This makes death something different from an end (or even a kind of sleep like Donne's poem says) instead pain, struggles, fear, weaknesses, mistakes and death itself are:</span></div>
<blockquote class="tr_bq" style="text-align: center;">
<span style="font-family: Times, Times New Roman, serif; font-size: large;">"Not insuperable barriers. Not semi-colons. Just a comma."</span></blockquote>
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kirsthttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13230739583008991647noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5761403638561235036.post-63333619565702688912014-06-26T10:10:00.003-07:002014-06-26T10:29:50.697-07:00Something to keep in mind with everything going on these daysThere are always hot-button issues and most of the time every angle has a form of plausibility and rational ground to stand on. I think we could all do a little better to remember that, as well as 1 Corinthians 13:1-8<br />
<i><br />1 <u>Though I speak with the tongues of men and of angels, and have not charity, I am become as sounding brass, or a tinkling cymbal</u>.<br /><br /> 2 <u>And though I have the gift of prophecy</u>, and <u>understand all mysteries</u>, and <u>all knowledge</u>; and though I have all faith, so that I could remove mountains, <u>and have not charity, I am nothing.</u></i><br />
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<i>3 And though I bestow all my goods to feed the poor, and though I give my body to be burned, and have not charity, it profiteth me nothing.</i><br />
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We may be in a position to speak with authority. We may have prophetic insight into the issue. We may know everything about a topic there is to know. However, <b>if we don't use all that with charity it is nothing.</b><i><br /><br /> 4 Charity <u>suffereth long,</u> and is kind; charity envieth not; charity vaunteth not itself, <u>is not puffed up</u>,</i><br />
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<b>We use it with charity by</b> being willing to suffer, to feel upset and angry and misunderstood and yet wait patiently for the right timing. We do not allow what we have and know to give us a sense of superiority or rightness just because we were LUCKY or BLESSED enough to have/know it.<i><br /><br /> 5 <u>Doth not behave itself unseemly</u>, <u>seeketh not her own</u>, <u>is not easily provoked</u>, <u>thinketh no evil</u>;</i><br />
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<b>We use it with charity by</b> not acting out in ways that degrade who we are or what we stand for, that alienate others and undermine our cause (a message loses credibility when its messenger lacks credibility). We do not seek after our own agenda and ignore the positions/ideas/feelings of others. We don't let other's ignorance, thoughtlessness, or belligerence push us from always taking the high road. We choose to always think the best of others -- to give them the benefit of the doubt.<i><br /><br /> 6 <u>Rejoiceth not in iniquity</u>, but rejoiceth in the truth;</i><br />
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<b>We use it with charity by </b>not rejoicing when difficult/bad/unpleasant things happen to others -- even when they are the consequences of their own actions (but instead, we mourn with them).<i><br /><br /> 7 Beareth all things, believeth all things, hopeth all things, endureth all things.<br /><br /> 8 Charity never faileth: but whether there be prophecies, they shall fail; whether there be tongues, they shall cease; whetherthere be knowledge, it shall vanish away.</i><br />
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Doing all of this will never fail in keeping us right with God. Knowing and speaking "the truth" are not enough to save us. <b>ONLY CHARITY.</b>kirsthttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13230739583008991647noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5761403638561235036.post-89388513558465309272014-03-13T13:16:00.000-07:002014-03-13T13:16:22.455-07:00"Temple Worship and Temple Worthiness"<a href="http://bycommonconsent.com/2014/02/28/temple-worship-and-temple-worthiness/#more-48837">Read this article, </a><i><a href="http://bycommonconsent.com/2014/02/28/temple-worship-and-temple-worthiness/#more-48837">Temple Worship and Temple Worthiness</a>. </i>It introduces a new way of experiencing the LDS temple endowment, where the ceremony can be:<blockquote class="tr_bq">
"...a progressively unnerving reminder of how inadequate we are, how miserably we fail to live up to our sacred commitments, what a fallen world this is and what fallen and vulnerable and exposed creatures we are. And then we should experience the spiritual relief wash over us as God, on the basis of only tokens of our effort and of our having even accepted the impossible commitments in the first place, accepts us, embraces us, lets us into His presence, gives us a place of rest, considers us worthy. The failures of our lives, ritually reenacted in the temple by our acceptance of obligations we know we cannot and will not and do not live up to, inevitably propel us toward an encounter with God in which our unworthiness to stand in His presence is manifest and inescapable, a state of unimaginable vulnerability. And yet we are taken in, and once in His presence, despite our unworthiness, we desire to stay."</blockquote>
kirsthttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13230739583008991647noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5761403638561235036.post-60625987542190233022014-03-05T15:15:00.000-08:002014-03-05T15:16:29.586-08:00Feeling "blessed"? <div class="tr_bq">
I wanted to share this exchange (as well as the article within it -- be sure to read that!) and solicit feedback from anyone willing.</div>
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This is an email from my brother, sent to my whole family:</div>
<blockquote class="tr_bq">
I had a discussion with a friend on our way to Twin Falls on Saturday and he was saying, essentially, that with paying tithing and other such commandments you are bribed with blessings in order to fulfill it. The idea is that God reinforces positive behavior with temporal wealth. “Oh well if you just are obedient and do what you're supposed to you'll be rich, successful, and happy.” This is further perpetuated with the “Book of Mormon” cycle thats taught in primary and sunday school.<br />
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Im curious what you guys think about this:<br />
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<a href="http://www.huffingtonpost.com/scott-dannemiller/christians-should-stop-saying_b_4868963.html#">http://www.huffingtonpost.com/scott-dannemiller/christians-should-stop-saying_b_4868963.html#</a></blockquote>
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My dad's response:<br />
<blockquote class="tr_bq">
That is a very difficult subject that is wrapped in all kinds of truths and lies. Unfortunately, statements commonly made, cliches spoken, phrases used do not always convey the reality of the truth. Trying to sort through them all can be an exercise in futility. What is a person meaning? What are they trying to say? Am I interpreting it correctly? Difficult. </blockquote>
<blockquote class="tr_bq">
I am not sure we can know how God blesses us. As Christians, it seems to me that we must acknowledge several things;(1) we are nothing, (2) God blesses us in many ways, all of which we are unworthy of, (4) as we are "blessed" we are obligated to help one another, (5) God's blessings come to ALL, righteous and unrighteous, (6) anything that is good comes from God,(7) we must not expect God to bless us as we believe he should,(7) God offers no guarantees in this life, his are all in the next, (8) God does bless us in his own way and in his own due time. </blockquote>
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My response:<br />
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<blockquote>
I agree with what Dad says! But I also want to respond to your points more specifically. </blockquote>
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As far as what you and your friend talked about, it is something that has arisen out of the shift in how/why we teach obedience. Old School christianity was all about “hellfire and damnation” and you were obedient in order to avoid that. Now-a-days we’ve shifted from obedience to avoid damnation or punishment to obedience in order to receive blessings. Neither is BAD but neither are particularly good/helpful either — and each carries a lot of baggage in the form of setbacks and misunderstandings. I think it’s milk before meat kind of obedience. Like when you’re a kid and you obey your parents to avoid punishment or to get rewards, because you don’t understand the reasons for the rules yet or why you parents set them. </blockquote>
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Ultimately the best reason to obey is love. Our love for God changes the desires of our hearts and inspires us to actions in accordance with His will i.e. obedience. </blockquote>
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The attitude of everything that is considered “good” being a “blessing” (including material wealth as indicated in the article) I think just arises out of the Christian culture of obedience for rewards. It’s not the best way to teach obedience… but we have a tendency to do this with EVERY topic (i.e. guilt you into doing it or encourage you w/rewards: think about your last lesson on service or modesty for example). To truly "teach obedience" what we SHOULD be teaching is the Atonement. The more anyone understands who Christ is and what he did the more these other things tend to fall into place.</blockquote>
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Anyone have anything to add?kirsthttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13230739583008991647noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5761403638561235036.post-57368456277238049342014-02-08T15:23:00.001-08:002014-02-08T15:23:07.091-08:00The Personal Essay<div class="tr_bq">
Eugene England commented on the value of the personal essay in the foreword of a book of his own essays:</div>
<blockquote>
<i>Ten years ago I became interested in the personal essay as a separate art form. I had already been writing personal essays for ten years and had published others’ essays in Dialogue without thinking much about the particular literary and religious strengths of the form. But in studying Mormon literature of the nineteenth century and then analyzing what many Mormon writers of my generation were doing that might be part of a recognizable literary tradition, I became convinced, as I wrote in a review of the first anthology of Mormon literature, that the Mormon heritage “shows to best advantage in various forms of personal witness to faith and experience, genres in which the truth of actual living, of quite direct confession, is at least as important as aesthetic or metaphorical truth, [such as] diaries, letters, sermons, lyric poetry,… autobiography,… and increasingly, the personal essay” (BYU Studies, Spring 1975). Since that time the Mormon personal essay has indeed increased in availability and conscious quality.<br /><br />This collection is an attempt to show by example what the resources of the personal essay can be in a Mormon’s search for self and community. (<a href="http://signaturebookslibrary.org/?p=3280">Dialogues with Myself</a>)</i></blockquote>
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I definitely have found a very strong sense of self and community through reading articles and blog posts online as well as essays in books. (For example, England's book referenced above. [so good!]) It's part of why belonging to a faith community is valuable (and how "folk doctrines" can actually be a positive thing!)<br />
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There is a lot of power in the personal essay -- it's part of why I write about things here actually; I have been blessed to read the thoughts and testimonies of others and had the spirit witness to me of the truth and power in their expressions of their thoughts and experiences -- and I hope to pay it forward in the same way. It's good to be reminded that there is a community of fellow-saints out there in the world struggling and staying faithful as I am.<br />
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So, all that being said, there's a collection of essays called <i>Why I Stay: The Challenges of Discipleship for Contemporary Mormons</i> (editor: Robert A. Rees) that I stumbled across randomly while perusing some LDS articles online during stake conference (whoops!) a few weeks ago. The first essay was available to read in <a href="http://www.amazon.com/Why-Stay-Challenges-Discipleship-Contemporary-ebook/dp/B007OUYS8Y/ref=tmm_kin_swatch_0?_encoding=UTF8&sr=&qid=">the free kindle sample</a> and I loved it -- so I bought the whole book! I wish I had the self-discipline to write a little piece about every essay, because each one is unique and wonderful... but since I don't, I'll just say this: they all had many similarities, as we face many of the same challenges as Mormons in our current society, but they each also had their own unique tone and personality. Each resonated with me in it's own individual way.<br />
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I HIGHLY RECOMMEND THIS BOOK AND EVERY ESSAY IN IT.<br />
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We all have our different considerations for "why I stay"(or don't stay) and I think how we answer that question is always changing. This collection of essays does beautiful work as a resource in a Mormon's "search for self and community."<br />
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Anyhow, like I always tell my students -- to be persuasive, don't just TELL... you need to SHOW. So in order to show, I am going try and do at least one post about one essay soon (it not only resonated with me, but taught me a life-changing concept and included a beautiful hopeful prayer for the future.) Stay tuned!kirsthttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13230739583008991647noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5761403638561235036.post-70923292375085368032014-01-21T22:01:00.001-08:002014-01-21T22:03:07.447-08:00having a cause<blockquote class="tr_bq">
<i>“A quiet secluded life in the country, with the possibility of being useful to people to whom it is easy to do good, and who are not accustomed to have it done to them; then work which one hopes may be of some use; then rest, nature, books, music, love for one's neighbor — such is my idea of happiness.”</i><br />
― Leo Tolstoy <a href="http://www.goodreads.com/work/quotes/18471048"><i>Family Happiness</i></a></blockquote>
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Today <a href="http://marleerocker.blogspot.com/">my roommate</a> and I saw a very interesting documentary. This post isn't the place to get into what it was about, but while we were talking about the film at lunch we discovered there was one line in it that jumped out at us both. It more or less stated that whatever you think is the most important cause in the world right now is the one you should be working at (and if you aren't, why not?!) It struck us both because, while we both have strong feelings and opinions on many world and societal issues, there isn't really one grand cause in particular that we feel particularly well-suited to make much of a difference in (based on our individual abilities and influence). I don't mean this to sound defeatist. I also don't want to downplay the AMAZING work being done by incredible civic leaders and inspired activists, many of whom start out as unqualified as I am, or the need to be involved in larger community causes. I just want to explain how the limit to my influence, which limits what I am able to actually DO, actually inspires me -- but in a very different direction.<br />
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I know it goes against the assurance of <i>the american dream</i> that anyone can do anything they work hard for. I know it goes against the idealistic motto that <i>with God all things are possible</i>. It's not that I don't see the reasoning behind these ideas and agree with them to a degree -- it's just that I'm also a bit of a realist and when it all comes down to it, I understand the limits of my capacities, my context, and that God's will often involves me operating within these constraints. And I don't see this as a bad thing.<br />
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Bigger causes often seem more important than those that are on limited and more intimate scale. But but small in scale doesn't equal small in influence.<br />
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I started of this post with that quote by Tolstoy not just because it is also MY "idea of happiness"<span style="color: magenta;">*</span> but because it is also my idea of my cause -- of my purpose and source of satisfaction (which ultimately contributes to happiness). I don't have the ethos to affect change on a grand scale. I do have a little bit of credibility however with a few close friends and my immediate family. These are the ones I can influence for good in a just cause. Within my small circle is good I can do, unique to my abilities and the particular conditions of the situation. There is useful work that doesn't change the world at large but does affect the world of those around me. There is love to be nurtured with individuals for whom that love can be life-shaping.<br />
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I have come to the realization that limits are as God-given as capacities. Mine have placed me in a unique position to understand the beauty and meaning in serving the causes found within "a quiet secluded life" and of the special focus on intimate associations it affords.<br />
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I will always want to find ways to make a difference in the bigger causes that I care about and I hope I can find and do them. But, I also hope to never let that diminish meaning I find the modest work I do to make a difference to those few God has placed within my sphere.<br />
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<span style="color: magenta;">*</span><span style="font-size: x-small;">as a side note: that quote really does encapsulate perfectly my IDEAL of happiness. Beauty, culture, service, work, love -- all the BEST of this life. I feel I could devote a whole post just to expounding on how how the truth of Tolstoy's words resonates with me!</span>kirsthttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13230739583008991647noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5761403638561235036.post-72391823103153503762014-01-04T11:55:00.002-08:002014-01-04T11:55:23.568-08:00the parable of the talents<br />
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I was discussing Matthew 25:14-30 (about the parable of the talents) with my family and we all sorta realized how little we really understood this parable -- that we had always just accepted the conventional explanations and perhaps missed its secrets for so many years… </div>
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Consider the following questions my brother raised:</div>
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<i>In modern english, the word "talent" has come to refer exclusively to any kind of mental endowment, aptitude, or physical ability. From the perspective of those hearing the parable (and the author of the gospel), a talent was a measurement of money. Has the modern understanding of the parable been based exclusively on the contemporary definition of the word "talent"? Perhaps restricting the parable's definition to modern english's definition of the word "talent" is too restrictive? But not including that definition in the parable's interpretation could be too exclusive as well no? Is there something else here? </i> </blockquote>
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<i>The description of the "lord" in the parable is interesting and I'm not sure what to make of it if it's supposed to be a parallel to God. The man with a single talent described his lord thus: "I knew thee that thou art an hard man, reaping where thou hast not sown, and gathering where thou hast not strewed". This seems to indicate the master enriches himself at the cost of others. The master himself admits: "thou knewest that I reap where I sowed not, and gather where I have not strewed". So he is admitting he is known to be ruthless and rapacious in business and expects the servant to have acted similarly? That doesn't seem to be a very apt description of who God is … at least not to me.</i> </blockquote>
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<i>Lastly, the amounts distributed to the slaves, at least from what I've read, are actually very large. Supposedly, a talent was equivalent to about 6,000 denarii, a denarii being equal to a day's wage for a common laborer. Thus, one talent, would be about twenty years worth of wages (no small amount). Five talents, as given to another one of the servants, would be about 100 years worth of wages. Why then does the Lord say, "Well done, thou good and faithful aservant: thou hast been faithful over a few things, I will make thee ruler over many things"? In my mind, another way of saying this would be "you've been faithful over a little, I'll put you in charge of a lot" even though one talent is not "a little".</i></blockquote>
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In consideration of these questions my dad sent us all a link to one man's interpretation of the parable -- which aptly answers these questions. I strongly urge you to read and reread this analysis of the parable of the talents. It is so beautiful and so profound, just as Jesus intended I think.</div>
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<a href="http://www.raystedman.org/new-testament/matthew/living-dangerously">http://www.raystedman.org/new-testament/matthew/living-dangerously</a> ***</div>
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***p.s. To me this understanding of the parable is born out well with the verse (similar to the one in Matthew) in D&C 82:3</div>
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<i> For of him unto whom much is given much is required; and he who sins against the greater light shall receive the greater condemnation.</i></blockquote>
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I always read this verse as referring to more than just talents/blessings we are given, so sinning "against the greater light" does not mean not failing to use talents/abilities, it is failing to live up to what you know to be God's will for your life -- refusing to see what has been illuminated for you, or seeing it and rejecting it. Some of us have a clearer understanding/more illumination, and so when we fail to live accordingly -- when we wrap ourselves up "with hobbies and little luxuries" and selfishness as C.S. Lewis put it -- we fail just the way the author described in the analysis of the parable. </div>
kirsthttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13230739583008991647noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5761403638561235036.post-77491075967452974732013-12-20T12:03:00.000-08:002014-01-21T22:04:18.372-08:00oppositions in the church<i>I wrote the following as a post script to my answer to a question posed to the <a href="http://askangelaslc.wordpress.com/2013/11/23/ask-angela-discussion-topic-feminist-women-disrupting-the-class/">Ask Angela column (go read the full response if ya like). </a></i><span style="font-family: Times, Times New Roman, serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: Times, Times New Roman, serif;"><b>WHY OPPOSITIONS IN THE CHURCH ARE PRODUCTIVE : They push us toward a new kind of being.</b></span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Times, Times New Roman, serif;">Eugene England explained it this way: "In the life of the true Church, there are constant opportunities for all to serve, especially to learn to serve people we would not normally choose to serve—or possibly even associate with—and thus opportunities to learn to love unconditionally. There is constant encouragement, even pressure, to be “active”: to have a calling” and thus to have to grapple with relationships and management, with other peoples ideas and wishes, their feelings and failures; to attend classes and meetings and to have to listen to other people’s sometimes misinformed or prejudiced notions and to have to make some constructive response; to have leaders and occasionally to be hurt by their weakness and blindness, even unrighteous dominion; and then to be made a leader and find that you, too, with all the best intentions, can be weak and blind and unrighteous. Church involvement teaches us compassion and patience as well as courage and discipline. It makes us responsible for the personal and marital, physical, and spiritual welfare of people we may not already love (or may even heartily dislike), and thus we learn to love them. It stretches and challenges us, though disappointed and exasperated, in ways we would not otherwise choose to be— and thus gives us a chance to be made better than we might choose to be, but ultimately need and want to be. ( <a class="_553k" href="http://www.eugeneengland.org/why-the-church-is-as-true-as-the-gospel" rel="nofollow" style="color: #3b5998; cursor: pointer; text-decoration: none;" target="_blank">http://www.eugeneengland.org/why-the-church-is-as-true-as-the-gospel</a> )</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Times, Times New Roman, serif;">I love that explanation because it conveys that it is also as much my responsibility to love and be patient with those who feel there is no place for "disruptive feminists," as it is their responsibility to accept and love "disruptive feminists." We are all a part of the "school of love" of belonging to a church full of people different from us. </span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Times, Times New Roman, serif;">Also, it's funny because we (my roommates and I) were just talking yesterday about how we have had to very quickly come to terms with the fact that, to be who we are and to say the things that we say, to speak out against what we view as ignorance and misunderstanding, means accepting the consequences... that we may create "contention" and be disliked. In a small way, it feels like how the prophets were stoned for saying what was hard for those around them to hear.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Times, Times New Roman, serif;">And in the midst of all of this we are to maintain a Christlike love for those who don't understand us and who "stone" us. It's good to be reminded that that they have a place in the body of Christ, the same as me.</span></div>
kirsthttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13230739583008991647noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5761403638561235036.post-44096404582809337042013-10-21T10:12:00.002-07:002013-10-21T10:12:36.257-07:00love's greatest gift<blockquote class="tr_bq">
<i><br />I know a man who’s smart, kind, generous, and overall the sort of person you’d call first if you got into any kind of trouble. Unfortunately, he is also the worst story/joke/anecdote teller I have ever met. Worse, for some mysterious reason he delights in telling stories that have no point, jokes that aren’t funny, tedious anecdotes that meander forever and then just end. Like a highway in the middle of nowhere that abruptly stops because the builders ran out of money. Unfortunately this man enjoys holding the floor at parties and gatherings. Inevitably when he sees a chance, he jumps right into the fray with a “I heard a great joke—” or “The strangest thing happened to me this morning—” But his joke is never great and what happened to him that morning turns out to be a long and winding road to verbal nowhere. This man’s wife died recently and only now did I realize he lost among other things, his greatest audience. One of the endearing things about love is how it blinds us to certain obvious faults in our partners, despite the fact everyone else sees them. Once at a large party this man was telling a story. His wife was listening with a big smile and her full attention beaming 100 watts right at him. If you scanned the rest of the room you saw a lot of glazed eyes and looks of impatience. But not her. To her eyes, her husband had *grandezza*, the great Italian word that connotes not only greatness, but larger-than-lifeness. When he spoke, no one listened like she did, no matter what he was saying. And that might have been her greatest gift of all to him.</i> — <a href="http://www.openroadmedia.com/jonathan-carroll">Jonathan Carroll</a></blockquote>
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(I think I would go so far as to say that maybe it isn't a "blindness" to the faults of those we love -- but that because we love them that we can fully see them -- see past faults that would obstruct our vision -- and love them for who they truly are.)kirsthttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13230739583008991647noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5761403638561235036.post-57499861869559603772013-10-15T11:05:00.000-07:002014-03-10T10:04:44.579-07:00The Paradox of GuiltThe Paradox of Guilt<br />
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I've been thinking lately about the complex nature of guilt. In rudimentary lessons on sin we are taught that it is one of the basic required steps of repentance to feel sorrow for what we have done; to feel guilt.<br />
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It is, in fact, in our moral nature to feel this. Eugene England quotes the words of Christ in John 9:41: "If ye were blind, ye should not sin, but now ye say, We see; therefor your sin remaineth" while pointing out that it is in acting in contrary to what we know to be right that we experience "the inner estrangement of guilt" and then goes on to explain: "We all know sin. We are inescapably moral by nature in that we cannot evade the question that finally comes into all reflection: "Am I justified?" We have eaten of the tree of knowledge of good and evil and find the self of action tragically divided against the self of belief" (<i><a href="http://eugeneengland.org/wp-content/uploads/sbi/articles/1966_e_002.pdf">That they might not suffer: The gift of the Atonement</a> </i>1).<br />
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We are divided in two -- what we know we should do and what we actually do. This division is exquisitely painful. So much so that in Alma 15:3 Zeezrom is described as being sick with a fever as the result of "the great tribulations of his mind on account of his wickedness" and his sins "did harrow up his mind until it did become exceedingly sore, having no deliverance; therefore he began to be scorched with a burning heat."<br />
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There is such despair in knowing your have sinned -- that you have turned from God and rightness. This is compounded if you have hurt or brought down others as well. And then, worst of all, there is the disgust you feel for yourself when it something you have done before... something you tried so hard not to do again... and yet here you are again in your utter lack of self-control and total weakness.<br />
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Ultimately however, our sins and the accompanying guilt and sorrow are not meant to define us or rule over our lives. Our recognition and suffering is meant to springboard us to healing. In Alma 39:7-8 Alma explains to his erring son "I would not dwell upon your crimes, to harrow up your soul, if it were not for your good. But behold, ye cannot hide your crimes from God; and except ye repent they will stand as a testimony against you at the last day." We must see our guilt and feel guilty in order to have the impetus necessary to turn and face justice -- and with it, mercy and healing.<br />
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Elder Uchtdorf did a beautiful job of explaining this concept in a way which encourages us all: "The Apostle Paul taught that “godly sorrow worketh repentance to salvation … but the sorrow of the world worketh death.”Godly sorrow inspires change and hope through the Atonement of Jesus Christ. Worldly sorrow pulls us down, extinguishes hope, [tells us we are broken, damaged goods] and persuades us to give in to further temptation."<br />
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"Godly sorrow leads to conversion and a change of heart. It causes us to hate sin and love goodness. It encourages us to stand up and walk in the light of Christ’s love. True repentance is about transformation, not torture or torment." (<i><a href="https://www.lds.org/general-conference/2013/10/you-can-do-it-now?lang=eng">You Can Do it Now</a></i> Oct. 2013)<br />
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Unfortunately too many suffer under the burden of guilt more than is necessary. Alma lovingly told his son that he "should let these things trouble you no more, and only let your sins trouble you, with that trouble which shall bring you down unto repentance" (Alma 42:29). When we choose to turn our face back to the Lord we must learn to let go of our guilt, and to permit others to do the same.<br />
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I feel like there is an unpleasant tendency in the church to turn sin into a monster. I understand why, and the intentions behind it aren't altogether bad. Our leaders are just trying to impress upon us the pitfalls of certain choices -- and that it is good for us to avoid the suffering the accompanies our mistakes (though ultimately I think it is arrogant to assume we can avoid doing what we were sent here to do i.e. live, sin, & repent). But turning sin into a monster, to try and scare us away from it, just makes our association with the monster when we (inevitably) fall a major problem, because it makes us monstrous in our own eyes and often in the eyes of others. Think about who is often on the fringes of the church? It is those who keep making mistakes -- who we then distance ourselves from because they have been marked by the monster and we shake our heads at their association. We take a kind of pride in being someone who "doesn't make those kinds of mistakes" [never, not once] which, as pride always does, places enmity between us and God as it puts the emphasis on our works over His grace. It also makes our fall much harder if we do make "that kind" of mistake. Rather than being just a fallible human being making totally natural errors, we are marked as a sinner who associated with the monster -- and even once we have resolved, repented of, and been forgiven we carry "the mark" and its attendant guilt.<br />
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It is common in the church to overly-dispense guilt. It seems to be common to many churches -- and is the general stereotype of religion; one fairly accurately born of historic roots [see: every hellfire and damnation sermons of the 19th & 20th century] as obedience has been so often taught as something we must do to avoid being a sinner i.e. scum. We heap it on ourselves and others. We slip into taking what is meant to be merely an ignition and we fan it into a roaring blaze that consumes us.<br />
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Instead, we should be much quicker to move on, and not try and "use" guilt to promote obedience. Joseph Smith stated: "Nothing is so much calculated to lead people to forsake sin as to take them by the hand, and watch over them with tenderness. When persons manifest the least kindness and love to me, O what power it has over my mind, while the opposite course has a tendency to harrow up all the harsh feelings and depress the human mind" (History of the Church, 5:23–24). Fanning the flames of guilt only makes the course of repentance more difficult -- the the depths of despair seem increasingly bottomless.<br />
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The division between us and God -- between what we want to do and what we are able to do, is already great enough (see Romans 7:14-25 & 8:1-6), we don't need to wallow in it or rub it in each others open wounds.<br />
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It is the purpose of the Atonement to resolve this division and reveal the truth within the paradox of guilt that debases... but ultimately exalts. Because the law, and our morality, point us in the direction we should go, what we must do, and who we must become, it also becomes "a terrible burden because humans always fail to some degree in living it fully; it therefor stands as a continual reminder of our failure -- a failure that the law's framework of justice demands be paid for, but which we are incapable of paying for. God pierces to the heart of this paradox through the Atonement, and it becomes possible for us personally to experience both alienation and reconciliation, which opens us to the full meaning of both evil and good, bringing us to a condition of meekness and lowliness of heart where we can freely accept from God the power to be a god (<i><a href="http://eugeneengland.org/wp-content/uploads/sbi/articles/1966_e_002.pdf">That they might not suffer: The gift of the Atonement</a> </i>England 7).<br />
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Alma 42:30:<br />
"O my son, I desire that ye should deny the justice of God no more. Do not endeavor to excuse yourself in the least point because of your sins, by denying the justice of God; but do you let the justice of God, and his mercy, and his long-suffering have full sway in your heart; and let it bring you down to the dust in humility."<br />
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We must not deny the guilt of sin or the justice of God -- but we must not deny the humility it brings and thus the promised healing -- of inner & outer conflict as well as forgiveness from others as well as the power to forgive oneself, and find that which is "large enough in love to reach past the wrongs we have done and can never fully make restitution for; that there be hope in the possibility that anyone can be renewed by specific means to a life of greater justice and mercy toward others" (<i><a href="http://eugeneengland.org/wp-content/uploads/sbi/articles/1966_e_002.pdf">That they might not suffer: The gift of the Atonement</a> </i> England 2).<br />
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Someday I will get to stop failing. In the meantime, the redemptive forgiveness of God makes my failure a school of Godliness.<br />
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It takes a kind of emotional self discipline not to allow ourselves to give into guilt, regret, and despair. Continually reminding ourselves of the meaning of God's love can provide the sustenance necessary to give our will the power to maintain realistic expectations of ourselves and others -- and not give into regret, which is ultimately useless. Instead we should respond with "Now that I know more from my mistake, I'll understand things, and myself, better and I will do better next time." After all, “Good judgment comes from experience; experience comes from bad judgment" ((<i>Why the True Church Cannot be Perfect</i> <a href="http://66.147.244.190/~dialogu5/wp-content/uploads/premium/Dialogue_V46N01_42.pdf">Terry</a> 99).<br />
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We must not to sit under the weight of our mistakes, but see them as experience and knowledge -- a chance to better understand ourselves and the human condition; what this all says about me, the truth of my weaknesses, and what it means for me to be in mortality.<br />
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Adam and Eve chose to give us the venue for this experience, a fallen world where we experience life as fallen creatures. We were perfect spiritual beings -- and now we are having the experience of imperfection; to be humbled by it, to learn about and experience good & evil, to acquire empathy and charity, and to become like God. Rather than thinking of this life as a test that we often "fail," (though I would go so far as to say that sinning is not failing -- and is in fact what enables us to actually succeed) I think it's more useful to think of it as a laboratory "God’s grand laboratory — where we are allowed to experiment with dangerous substances" and through trial and error "we are able to apply our minds, hearts, ingenuity, initiative, and faith in creating crude approximations of something truly wonderful" ((<i>Why the True Church Cannot be Perfect</i> <a href="http://66.147.244.190/~dialogu5/wp-content/uploads/premium/Dialogue_V46N01_42.pdf">Terry</a> 100).<br />
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As part of the process of repentance we must learn look at ourselves objectively -- and be as fair and kind as God. He loves us in our sins. His love permits us to be at one with ourselves, even in the midst of our continual inability to always do what is right. This is the peace that the Atonement offers us, to live daily in "the shock of eternal love expressed in Gethsemane" and the be infused with the power to resist needless suffering from our mistakes though the understanding that "If God can have this kind of love for me, who am I to withhold it from myself?" (<i><a href="http://eugeneengland.org/wp-content/uploads/sbi/articles/1966_e_002.pdf">That they might not suffer: The gift of the Atonement</a></i> 11-12).kirsthttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13230739583008991647noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5761403638561235036.post-78426045180967036442013-09-04T09:04:00.001-07:002013-09-04T09:04:11.946-07:00here, we have no continuing city<blockquote class="tr_bq">
If the Christian Revelation is true, then it must be true for all times and in all circumstances. Whatever may happen, however seemingly inimical to it may be the way the world is going and those who preside over its affairs, its truth remains intact and inviolate. “Heaven and Earth shall pass way,” Our Lord said, “but my words shall not pass away.” Our Western Civilization, like others before it, is subject to decay, and must sometime or other decompose and disappear. The world's way of responding to intimations of decay is to engage equally in idiot hopes and idiot despair. On the one hand, some new policy or discovery is confidently expected to put everything to rights: a new fuel, a new drug, détente, world government, North Sea oil, revolution, or counter-revolution. On the other, some disaster is confidently expected to prove our undoing: capitalism will break down; communism won't work; fuel will run out; plutonium will lay us low; atomic waste will kill us off; overpopulation will suffocate us all or alternatively a declining birth rate will put us at the mercy of our enemies. In Christian terms such hopes and fears are equally beside the point. As Christians,<i> we know that here we have no continuing city</i>. The crowns roll in the dust and every earthly kingdom must sometime flounder. --Malcom Muggeridge</blockquote>
kirsthttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13230739583008991647noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5761403638561235036.post-30950419932406574132013-09-01T20:45:00.000-07:002013-09-01T20:45:00.514-07:00sin<blockquote class="tr_bq">
<span style="font-size: large;">Perhaps a sin that humbles you is better than a good deed that makes you arrogant.</span><br />- Hamza Yusuf</blockquote>
kirsthttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13230739583008991647noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5761403638561235036.post-44113523717388736382013-09-01T08:52:00.000-07:002013-09-01T20:33:27.132-07:00storms & grace<blockquote class="tr_bq">
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<i><span style="font-size: large;">But it is in storms that He does his finest work, for it is in storms that He has our keenest attention. </span></i>-Max Lucado</blockquote>
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I've been thinking a lot about opposition/ trials/ sadness/ trouble/ sin/ weakness/ difficulty i.e. everything that isn't easy about life and that we tend not to equate with happiness. In the set-up for the quote above, the author brings up how we often expect God to come to us in<span style="background-color: #f4f4f4; font-family: Verdana, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 14px; font-style: italic; line-height: 17px;"> </span>"peaceful hymns or Easter Sundays or quiet retreats" and that we don't anticipate "to see him in a bear market, pink slip, lawsuit, foreclosure, or war" (<a href="http://www.amazon.com/gp/product/0849921392/ref=as_li_ss_tl?ie=UTF8&tag=lessfromthebo-20&linkCode=as2&camp=1789&creative=390957&creativeASIN=0849921392">source</a>).<br />
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When I consider the moments when I felt the Spirit <i>the strongest</i>, when I reflect on the times I changed <i>the most</i>, when I admit to myself when I felt <i>the closest </i>to my Savior... it was in the midst of opposition/ trials/ sadness/ trouble/ sin/ weakness/ difficulty -- it was in the storms.<br />
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And this is all obvious stuff right? I'm not telling you anything you haven't heard before. But I feel the need to share this now because I realized that for me, there was a definable moment when this concept really sunk in... and it changed EVERYTHING... it changed <i>me</i>...<br />
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I guess it was almost like in Mosiah, after King Benjamin finishes speaking to his people, and they say:<br />
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"Yea, we believe all the words which thou hast spoken unto us; and also, we know of their surety and truth, because of the Spirit of the Lord Omnipotent, which has wrought a mighty change in us, or in our hearts, that we have no more disposition to do evil, but to do good continually." (Mosiah 5:2)</blockquote>
In my case, I read something, I don't even remember what exactly (an article in <i>The Ensign</i> I think?) along the lines of how every trial comes to us with a gift in its hands -- and I felt the truth of it <u>so strongly</u>. But then it didn't stop there, because from that moment on, without that much conscious effort on my part, I just started planning out how to find that gift -- I began anticipating and searching for God as I entered each new struggle. It wasn't a gradual shift, like so many others in my life (and how change usually happens) but a complete switch in my attitude towards hard things in my life which reflected in many of my actions -- suddenly my heart was just <i>different</i>.<br />
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It wasn't nearly so grand as the people of King Benjamin, or so complete a turn around like that of Alma the Younger or Paul. It was, in the scheme of things, a very small thing in a life still very much in need of many more changes... but it is still nonetheless a real moment in my life when I experienced a near instantaneous change in my heart.<br />
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To someone who has had to be forcefully molded bit by bit, bent a little trial by trial, & made to understand truth sliver by sliver, this small yet huge opening of the windows of heaven is a true indicator to me of the love, tender mercy, and grace of my Heavenly Father. To me it shows that while yes, it is in the storms that God does great work on our souls, there are times when He will simply reach into our open hearts and lift us gently to a higher and nobler place.kirsthttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13230739583008991647noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5761403638561235036.post-75322811636556940722013-08-30T19:15:00.000-07:002013-08-30T19:15:08.517-07:00happiness or wholeness<blockquote class="tr_bq">
I actually attack the concept of happiness. The idea that - I don’t mind people being happy - but the idea that everything we do is part of the pursuit of happiness seems to me a really dangerous idea and has led to a contemporary disease in Western society, which is fear of sadness. It’s a really odd thing that we’re now seeing people saying “write down 3 things that made you happy today before you go to sleep”, and “cheer up” and “happiness is our birthright” and so on. We’re kind of teaching our kids that happiness is the default position - it’s rubbish. Wholeness is what we ought to be striving for and part of that is sadness, disappointment, frustration, failure; all of those things which make us who we are. Happiness and victory and fulfillment are nice little things that also happen to us, but they don’t teach us much. Everyone says we grow through pain and then as soon as they experience pain they say “Quick! Move on! Cheer up!” I’d like just for a year to have a moratorium on the word “happiness” and to replace it with the word “wholeness”. Ask yourself “is this contributing to my wholeness?” and if you’re having a bad day, it is.<br /><div style="text-align: center;">
- Hugh Mackay</div>
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kirsthttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13230739583008991647noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5761403638561235036.post-28945202541971456502013-08-29T07:20:00.000-07:002013-09-01T20:21:50.452-07:00Wholehearted<blockquote class="tr_bq">
Wholehearted living is about engaging in our lives from a place of worthiness. It means cultivating the courage, compassion, and connection to wake up in the morning and think, No matter what gets done and how much is left undone, I am enough. It’s going to bed at night thinking, Yes, I am imperfect and vulnerable and sometimes afraid, but that doesn’t change the truth that I am also brave and worthy of love and belonging<br />
- Brené Brown <i>Daring Greatly</i></blockquote>
kirsthttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13230739583008991647noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5761403638561235036.post-8542520362215828202013-08-08T08:26:00.004-07:002013-08-08T08:35:15.884-07:00why i stay Today, while reading and responding to a personal email, I got to thinking about why I belong to the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints.<br />
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Which, <i>coincidently</i>, my roommate and I were talking about just yesterday.<br />
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We both agreed that when we think about "the institution" of the church, there's enough there for either of us to just pick up and leave the church (with a bad taste in our mouthes) at any given moment. That being said, we discussed how spirituality is about individual communion with God AS WELL AS gathering with a fellowship of Christians -- that there's something about coming together with others, with "the body of Christ," that is absolutely critical to the experience of God (a lot of things actually but that's a topic for another day) So, to us that's part of why choosing a religion to gather with is so important. Every institution of any church is flawed -- but they all offer an opportunity to come together as a community, and community is important.<br />
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As I've gotten older however, I've realized that some communities are better for certain people than others...and many seem to be called to the place where they can find God in a way that fits them. God knows us, and if we are seeking Him, He will guide us to the best path for each of us individually to find and know Him. To be honest, I am not always sure that being part of the modern mormon community is the best fit for me... I have always sorta been on the fringes -- too stubborn to conform to the culture and always asking controversial/disconcerting questions. BUT then again, maybe that is why it IS a good fit -- it has been a challenge in many ways, and a rough stone needs to roll through rough terrain to become smooth...<br />
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That being said, what it all finally comes down to is this: The personal relationship that I have developed with God through belonging to the LDS church <u>is the most precious things that I have in my life</u> -- and it has been belonging to the LDS church, with its strengths and weaknesses, that this relationship has come; the doctrines, the experiences I've had (good & bad), the quirks of the culture, the people (wonderful ones & difficult ones), the inspiriting as well as terrible history -- everything is a part of me and has shaped who I am…... and it has also provided me with the opportunities to know God.<br />
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To me, that is a "true church" -- one that is bringing me to Christ -- so, because it is true for me, that is why, despite (or perhaps even because of...) doubts, discouragement, contradiction, hypocrisy, etc. I choose to stay. </div>
kirsthttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13230739583008991647noreply@blogger.com0